January 19, 2023
An Inspired Production of The Last Five Years at Southwark Playhouseby Randi / March 5, 2020A tad too late in the game for reminding English people that they actually approve of (the idea of) some refugees, The Prince of Egypt has arrived in London, packing ‘em in at the Dominion Theatre and taking no prisoners (except the Hebrews). Based on the 1998 DreamWorks movie of the same name, The Prince of Egypt tells the story you know from your babble, of a little Hebrew bebbeh whose mother put him in a basket and sent him down the river instead of keeping him to suffer the slavery and genocide of their people. That baby was discovered by the Queen of Egypt, who adopted him, named him Moses (surprise!), and raised him as her own, until he realized his heritage and decided, with the help of god, to save his people. It’s a fantastic story, and really a phenomenal idea for a musical. So why is this show so lackluster?
Honestly, it feels amateur. It feels like an early draft in terms of book (at least some of that dialogue, yeesh) and, much more so, score, which is a strange feeling to get about material that has existed in large part for more than 20 years. I hate to speak ill of my boy little Stevie Schwartz, composer of some of my favorite scores (like Pippin and Wicked (don’t even try to pretend you don’t also love the Wicked score, no one’s buying your bullshirt)), but aside from the Oscar-winning “When You Believe”, there are few musical numbers that don’t feel pedestrian, despite so many golden opportunities for great songs. And the layout, my god: in Act II, there was a 40-minute span where every. single. song. sounded the same, with the same melody, same key, same time signature. It’s like Musical Theatre 101 to not have songs that sound the same or achieve the same goal in a row, so to have like, 7 of them almost made me scream. It’s a shame that a production this huge and this destined for a long run has such a bland score.
The visuals of this production, however, are fire. I mean that literally – there’s a good amount of pyrotechnics used. This production is dripping with evidence of endless financial backing, and it’s quite a visual treat. The staging, the special effects, that stage lifting up to ‘drown’ the Egyptians (the best part!), it’s all great. Not in an artistic way, mind you, not in a ‘wow this is sophisticated storytelling’ way, but in a ‘wow this spectacle is fun to watch’ way.
That extends to the cast as well. Luke Brady is a strong Moses, tasked with the enormous burden of carrying the show and doing a commendable job. His brother-turned-enemy, Ramses, is played by a solid Liam Tamne who gave me strong Papi from Pose vibes while offering a very very different Ramses from what we’ve seen before from performers like Yul Brynner, much more obviously insecure and uncertain. Christine Allado’s Tzipporah, like most of the women in this male-centric show, was sung well but felt poorly written. Her first big song is a sexy dance in a cage and she’s like ‘when I dance I dance for me’ which could have given Miss Saigon early-first-act vibes but instead reminded me of the Crazy Ex Girlfriend song “Put Yourself First” where the girls satirically sing “make yourself sexy/just for yourself” and I was like, oof. Her character continued to enrage me when she complained about the possibility of having to live in the palace in order to SAVE AN ENTIRE RACE like holy what girl get over yourself oh it’s so sad you have to live like a princess in order to SAVE PEOPLE FROM SLAVERY my absolute goodness. Ramses’s wife Nefertari (which every time I heard it was like like “It’s NeferTITI oh wait no it’s not”) (played by Tanisha Spring) is similarly underwritten as a haughty bench, except she gets to show a softer side (really any side) with a moving song in Act II that was, unfortunately, too similar to the ones before and after it. I did like Alexia Khadime’s Miriam, possibly because she is only really in it to act like Jasmine in the marketplace pretending to be crazy (except not pretending) and then singing the best song, so, lucky her.
The ensemble is probably the hardest working in London right now, with endless difficult choreography demanded of them. I’m not sure if Sean Cheesman’s (stay fresh, cheese bags) nonstop, energetic, primal choreography is always necessary, but it’s always interesting to watch and feels raw and visceral in a unique way (I almost yelled in pain just watching some of the more intense moves). The talented ensemble may be the most diverse in London too, which is great.
But I’m not sure that huge diverse ensemble includes any Jews (and even if it did, the whole awkward dancing to chanting Hebrew felt strange). And that wouldn’t be the only problem with this show in terms of that representation. This is a show about Jews – not sure if you knew, but Moses, hoo boy, he’s big with us. And this is telling his entire story, from birth to the parting of the Red Sea, like, it’s foundational Judaism right here. But this production, aside from treating ‘Hebrew’ like it’s some exotic fictional designation (and never saying the word Jew), has sanitized the story so it never actually feels like it’s about religion. It really seems like this guy Moses is doing all of this on his own, with very few, too few, mentions of how god is working through him and how god is on the side of the Jews (chosen people helloooo). Also, his guilt about all the shit he’s wrought is sad but he never confronts god about what he’s making him do. Seriously if you didn’t know the story it’s very blink-and-you’ll-miss-when-they-mention-it’s-god’s-doing, when they mention that god wants to save the Jews. Which is weird. Maybe they wanted this to feel like a more universal refugee story, which is valid for today’s society, but there’s a way to do that without making it feel like Jewish erasure.
If you are a discerning theatregoer, you are better off forgetting about Charlton Heston’s crappiness for a bit and rewatching The Ten Commandments film and playing “When You Believe” at the opportune moment, like when I watch Legally Blonde and pause when she sees her name on the list of interns so I can sing “So Much Better” from the musical version. If, instead, you are an average London audience member who loves spectacle, you will love this.
INFORMATION
Act I ended after an hour and 20 minutes, and the show overall ended after 2 hours 45 minutes. Yes it is about 20 minutes too long.
I sat in the stalls, and I recommend sitting on the house left side aisles for easy access to the ladies rooms. There’s one up from the bar at the back on the left, and there’s one if you sit on the extreme left all the way down by the stage, so that’s a fun little secret few people knew about. This theatre is a g-d barn so I can’t say if the right side of the house was set up the same.
Like most things at the Dominion Theatre, the audience behaves like they’re at a rock concert (as most long-running recent productions have been rock concert-ish…or the traveling megachurch services, not even joking). Lots of phones, lots of talking and even at like, regular volume? I had to yell at an old man for nonstop loud talking and he didn’t stop so I had to sit back and stew and hope that corona gets him.
Maybe I’m just spoiled with well done theatres lately, but the Dominion is a mess right now, not really up to par with small hospitality things that every other West End and near-West End theatre does. Like, they have no water pitchers at the bars. If you want water you have to wait in the regular long bar line. What’s up with that nonsense! Also, only one of the stalls doors had a content warning sign (strobe lights, flashing, fire, &c) and I had to go searching for it. And there are no signs for the run time information so you have to find an usher to ask.
Also, programmes are £6. And they aren’t even giant souvenir-edition ones! Just for the regular small programme. PASS (over).
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A Return Trip to My Fair Lady at Lincoln Center Before It Leaves Us for No Good Reason
It’s Theatre Thursday! Today’s show is My Fair Lady on Broadway, closing on July 7 because of reasons, I guess.
Remember when I reviewed this new Broadway production of My Fair Lady last season (sure you do!) and I said I couldn’t stop thinking about how superb it was? Well, my brain recovered a tiny bit after about a year so I went back for another dose of INCREDIBLE THEATRE PERFECTION. I’ve been (hashtag) blessed to see some exquisite theatre, and the current Lincoln Center Theatre production of My Fair Lady is at the top of that list. I saw the Tony-nominated original cast when it opened last year, which included Lauren Ambrose and my main man Norbert “Norbie” Leo Butz, as Eliza Doolittle and her (checks notes) 10-years-older-than-her father, as well as Jordan Donica as a winning Freddy Eynsford-Hill (Brits love hyphenating to show status). I had to go back to see Broadway’s beloved Laura Benanti as Eliza, her dream role, and I ended up being even more devastated by this show’s brilliance this go-round.
If you don’t know the story of My Fair Lady – which, by the way, after an ENTIRE LIFE of knowing this musical, Z informed me for the first time ever that the title could be a joke on ‘Mayfair Lady’, like the area of London that the show generally takes place in, and it works even better because of Eliza’s original cockney accent because that’s how she’d say Mayfair and just like WHAT did everyone know this??? – it’s about a poor girl who sells flowers in Covent Garden (but not herself! She’s VERY ADAMANT about that, she’s a good girl she is!) and crosses paths with the arrogant and self-involved Professor Henry Higgins who makes a bet with his equally rich and equally linguistics-minded friend Colonel Pickering that he can transform this lowly flower girl into a lady just with elocution lessons (and a bath) and the men are like “yes do let’s” and Eliza’s like “eeeeayyyyy” but she wants to rise above her lot in life so she agrees and spends months and months living in Higgins’ GORGEOUS staffed-up house on Wimpole Street and their relationship gets complicated because feelings but also stubbornness and aforementioned arrogance and it’s all wonderful and heartbreaking and glorious. Meanwhile Eliza’s dad is a good-for-nothing who sings a 20-minute song about getting married.
I’m sure you love the movie and everything (and the original ending), but this production, I have shivers just thinking about it. Actual chill bumps. I wish it wasn’t closing; I would see it every year. Bartlett Sher’s impeccable direction and his grasp of Golden Age musicals have never been on more impressive display. Every inch of this show is perfectly orchestrated, including the lush orchestra playing these classic melodies. Every song is a highlight. I especially love the written-to-be-a-highlight “On the Street Where You Live”, now performed by Christian Dante White, the new Freddy, who has quickly proved himself to be Broadway’s new Kyle Dean Massey (i.e. a wonderful replacement). As Alfred Doolittle, Alexander Gemignani was out, but his understudy Joe Hart was wonderful (and actually looked older – Benanti and Gemignani are LITERALLY THE SAME AGE, smdh). And I love that if you choose one ensemble member to watch, you’ll get a whole other story from this person; they’re all doing nonstop character work that builds an entire world to house the story of Eliza and Higgins.
And Eliza and Higgins are so much more than I ever thought before seeing this production. Originally, with Lauren Ambrose, who brought so much acting precision to Eliza and made so much of the character, Eliza and Henry seemed to be on equal footing, in terms of whose story it was. I loved their interplay, and even though Eliza has some of the best and biggest songs in musical theatre, it was a treat to see deeply into this character with the help of an actress who is primarily an actress, not a singer. On the other hand, Benanti is an actress who is primarily an incredible singer (and was clearly sick and still went on and still sounded fabulous, though a little weaker than I know she can be, so deserves all the kudos). A Broadway staple for a remarkably long time considering how young she is, she was obviously great (though her English accent was…not), and looked amazing in the new costumes. But the subtle differences in portrayal showed a different relationship. With her Eliza, she was sassy and brave from the start, and you never doubted that she would always be able to take care of herself and put herself first when necessary. She was always going to be okay. With Ambrose, Eliza was much more delicate, much more in need of confidence and growth, making her decision at the end all the more emotional.
Although the ending is still beyond emotional (I cried like a BABY and might again right now thinking about it okay yep there we go), I felt it this time entirely from Henry’s perspective. Now, it’s clear that this is primarily a show about Henry Higgins, something I never realized before. Above all, this is a show about Henry’s personal failings, the ones that keep him from knowing true happiness. I never knew it, but My Fair Lady is honestly a tragedy, and it’s mainly a tragedy of toxic masculinity. I KNOW! WHO KNEW! All of this profound emotional impact is entirely due to the flawless and heartbreaking performance of Harry Hadden-Paton, a fully formed, fully feeling Higgins I cannot imagine ever being surpassed. Ever. I love me some Tony Shalhoub but it’s a crime that this performance didn’t win a Tony, I see this now. HP sauce shows Henry’s entire life and upbringing and habits and his discomfort in changing any of it, in each facial expression, each line delivery. It’s all incredible, and by the end it’s all heartbreaking. I honestly can’t believe how much he accomplished with this performance in creating what seemed like a real flawed person up on that stage. This production is one of the greatest of all time and I think it’s in large part because of his performance. I’m so glad I saw it again and so upset that HE COULDN’T JUST STOP BEING AN ASSHOLE AND BE HONEST AND BE HAPPY GODDAMMIT HERE WE GO AGAIN THE END.
INFORMATION
Since Lincoln Center is a nonprofit and they like stupid turnaround and crap like that I guess, the show is closing July 7, so if you are in NYC or like can feasibly get there in the next week, you REALLY G-D SHOULD.
Jerusalem with Mark Rylance: Biggest of Star Turns in Pertinent AF Play
It’s Theatre Thursday! We haven’t done one of these in ages, oops! I saw this months ago but I forgot! Today’s show is Jerusalem, playing at London’s Apollo Theatre until August 7.
Earlier this year (whatever year this is), husbo said to me ‘oh hey, you saw Jerusalem on Broadway with Mark Rylance, right? Was it good? What was it about?’ and I replied ‘uh…I know for sure it was NOT about actual Jerusalem?’ I know I saw it because I had a stage door picture with Mackenzie Crook, who I only really appreciated back then because he was a Pirate ghost, but I couldn’t remember anything else. That we’re talking about a play I saw more than 10 years ago had nothing to do with my complete lack of memory about what the show was about; I just didn’t appreciate it back then (Schmidt voice: YOUTHS.), although of course I appreciated how incredible Rylance was. Now that I’m old? wise?…no, BRITISH and living in England, I get what all the fuss is about. Jerusalem is engaging and provocative, and Rylance is only getting better with age.
So what IS it about? I remembered enough to tell myself I shouldn’t be worried about Jew-hatred-fueled protests outside the theatre (my expectations for a certain other show coming in the fall is another story), since the Jerusalem of the title is more about William Blake’s fabled glory of a green and promised land, that being the old mythologized England past. We meet a man named ‘Rooster’ Johnny Byron (Rooster is his nickname but that’s the order he always gives his name in, Arifa) who is essentially a squatter living in an RV in the woods (IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER) and about to be evicted because well he’s not paying for those woods and they want him out so the yuppies in the new builds have a clean view. Rooster would be my absolute nightmare of a neighbor, literally the worst imaginable save for the teenagers partying with him all night, teens are worse (YOUTHS!). See they have parties in these woods, which fine you do you, but if I can hear your music at 2am I will curse your existence and wish for your name to be stricken from the book of life. I’m pretty sure I’m aligning myself with the gentrifying villains in the play but we’re all about honesty here hey.
Despite expectations, Rylance makes Rooster JB a sympathetic character, right from the start, (how much do I adore Rylance’s signature cute little whisper boy voice that he sometimes does, you know what I mean, it’s so good, let me count the ways). Here’s this middle-aged-if -we’re-being-generous man, all puffed-chest bravado and lack of showers, partying with teenagers and giving them whatever drugs they want. That last part is bad, yes, but we learn that he’s really just giving these kids a safe place to be that they aren’t finding elsewhere, not even (or in some cases, especially not even) at home. So even though it’s cringey and illegal it’s also nice and thoughtful! Is he a good witch or a bad witch? Audiences can surely interpret either way, but my view was very much ‘good witch except everything is coming across wrong’.
We see Rooster over the course of a day, St. George’s Day, where there’s a local festival. As we meet the local gang that hangs around him – we can’t really call them friends – it feels like real time, not just because it’s 3 hours long. The time flies by, like you’re at the party yourself, or if you’re me like you’re watching other people at the party you would never want to be at and that’s how you want it. It’s REALLY funny at times, especially in the first act, but as the drama builds, it gets legit harrowing too. You fear for RJB even as you make Chrissy-Tiegen-Golden-Globes-yikes-face at some of his choices.
As the story intensifies, the aura of the mythology and sense of old magic shows itself as an important part of the story. One I can’t explain or understand, really, except in that vague theatrical sense that makes you feel all you need to know, the way you know a play is achieving what it wanted. Rylance holds all the various aspects – the legends and lore, the sad sack bad father, the man trying to protect some poor kids, the insanely bad decisions – together in that compelling and heartfelt way of his. He’s a real Snape, where arguments about his true character run the gamut and people can disagree reasonably. I didn’t actually read the books.
Seeing it now that I can understand the problems with modern England and how it’s falling apart and how my electric bills are honestly criminal adds so much depth to the show. Before I thought it was a great look at class conflicts that seemed very universal, that could be picked up and set in any number of locales. And that’s still true, but the Englishness of it all makes it particularly sharp. That sense of mythology about what the country once was like is so layered, because you could just roll your eyes and say ‘it wasn’t ACTUALLY like that’ (I won’t say her name again), or you could realize the fact that no, the ‘good old days’ never really were how they’re remembered, is exactly the point. It says so much about humanity – do we ever really change, or grow, or improve our society by e.g. evicting the squatter in the woods giving drugs to kids? What if he’s the only one trying? Or something like that. Oh also ogres, real or not? What a great question for a play to leave you thinking about.
INFORMATION
Jerusalem is 3 hours, 2 acts. One regular 15-20 minute interval and then a 5 minute ‘pause’.
Best seat in the house is G1 in the stalls because it’s RIGHT on the aisle RIGHT next to the stairs leading up to the too-small women’s bathroom, yesss. Perfect for that second interval that isn’t truly an interval. (I overheard a man asking an usher, ‘hey, babes, why is this second interval just a baby baby pause, why not give us 10 minutes instead of 5 so we could all piss ourselves?’ and the usher was like ‘oh we tried having two regular intervals but it was just way too long, people were rioting’ and like, seriously, dears, 5 extra minutes is not gonna be a drop in this 3 hours bucket, and the people are rioting more about not having pissin time.
The only bad thing about sitting so close/in the stalls is that it is a verrrrrry smoky show. I had terrible contact lens headaches from my eyes breathing in all their smoke and was wrecked for a while after. I am going to renew my campaign for theatres to behave like the rest of polite society and stop allowing smoking, it makes no sense and is completely unnecessary. If you can’t show me you’re cool in another way then you aren’t cool! or whatever you’re going for.
