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Challenge Accepted: Saint Joseph’s Pants Cavazoon (Sweet Chickpea Calzone)  & Happy St. Joseph’s Day! 

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      Today’s entry for my “Challenge Accepted” make-it-vegan series comes from a very special source: mia famiglia. My mom requested that I try to recreate the sweet chickpea cookies that my great-grandmother used to make for her, called “St. Joseph’s Pants”. A calzone-type cookie (called a ‘cavazoon’ in Sicily, where this is popular), the Pants are sweet doughy folds containing vanilla and honey-laden chickpea puree. They are traditionally served on St. Joseph’s Day (celebrating the spouse of Mary), which this year is March 19. The Eye-tals in my family reminisce fondly about these cookies and I just had to figure out more about them.      

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      Now, you may recall that bean-filled desserts have to be amazing to pass muster in my book. Those shite “you won’t believe it’s made with black beans!” brownie recipes are literally the Devil’s work. (So much so that this Devil is Capitalized.) But these are different. These cookies aren’t trying to hide their chickpeas; they are proud of them and want to show them off. In Sicily, chickpeas (‘ceci’) play a huge role in traditional celebrations, as they epitomize so perfectly the ability to take something basic and inexpensive and make magical creations with it. Chickpeas play an especially big role in the celebration of St. Joseph’s Day, in salads with fennel, in pastas with cauliflower and fava beans, and of course in these calzone-like cookies. These cookies demonstrate that when you quit trying to hide the beans in your dessert, and instead show some g-d respect, you can achieve wonderful results.
Also, if you missed Purim a few days ago, this is your lucky new holiday, because these Cavazoons are kind of like hamantaschen. Hooray for Jews & Italians, the two groups who do food best. I highly suggest making these because a) it’s one of my new favorite desserts but more so b) I feel bad for Joseph and want people to celebrate his holiday. What a crappy hand he got. I really don’t understand how all that shit went down and no one listened to him exclaiming “Um y’all are playing, right?”

SAINT JOSEPH’S PANTS
Sweet chickpea-filled mini calzone cookies are delicious baked or fried. We’ll include directions for both. I suggest doing half and half because sometimes you feel like a nut, but sometimes you don’t.

Calzone Dough
Ingredients

    • 1 1/4 cup sugar
    • 4 tablespoons ground flax seed
    • 1 cup canola oil
    • 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
    • 1 cup unsweetened almond milk plus extra tablespoons if needed
    • 5 cups flour
    • 1/2 teaspoon salt
    • dash cinnamon (optional I guess)
    • 1 teaspoon baking powder
    • 1/2 teaspoon baking soda

Directions

  1. In a large mixing bowl, mix sugar, flax, oil, vanilla, and almond milk until fully combined.
  2. Add the cinnamon, salt, baking powder, and baking soda and mix well.
  3. Slowly add the flour, little by little, slowly but surely, inch by inch, putting it together, and start to form a ball. Once you have formed a ball, knead for about 3 minutes.
  4. Refrigerate for an hour. (This is optional if you are in a rush.)
  5. Let thaw 45 minutes before using.

Chickpea filling
Ingredients

  • 2 cans chickpeas, washed well and drained
  • 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
  • 4 tablespoons agave nectar
  • 3 tablespoons brown sugar
  • 1 tablespoon white sugar
  • 1 tablespoon lemon juice
  • dash cinnamon

Directions

  1. Put it all in a highspeed blender, or a good food processor if your blender would leave chickpeas resembling chickpeas.
  2. Blend until smooth.

ASSEMBLY

  1. Remember to let your dough thaw and settle before handling.
  2. Break the dough ball into 4 parts.
  3. Roll each ball flat until it is about 1/2-1/4 inch thick.
  4. Use a circular glass, cookie cutter, or other object with about a 4-5 inch diameter to cut circles. I think I cut it freehand using a knife but not everyone is gifted in the arts.
  5. Place a tablespoon or so of the filling in the center of each circle.
  6. Fold the edges of the dough together over the filling, making a half-moon or semicircle. When you fold a circle in half, it becomes a semicircle. See, we are baking and learning maths.
  7. Take a fork and crease the edges of the folded-over dough. See, now it is like a mini-calzone.
  8. Repeat almost ad infinitum. This makes a lot. Like several dozen.
  9. When you are on the last ball of dough, preheat the oven to 350F.
  10. Finish circling, filling, and semi-circling that last ball of dough.
  11. Place half of the calzones on a parchment-paper-lined baking sheet. (Or all of them if you don’t want to try frying, or none of them if you are dead-set on frying all the things.)
  12. Bake for about 20 minutes, until golden but not burning.

For frying: 

  1. Now, for the fried pants!
  2. Get a biggg heavy-bottomed pot and fill it about an inch high with frying oil (non-virgin (opposite of Joseph’s wife) olive, canola, sunflower). Turn up the heat to high and let it sizzle.
  3. Drop as many cavazoons as will fit into the oil, cover the pot with the lid, and fry for a minute.
  4. After a minute, turn down the heat to medium and cook for 3-4 minutes.
  5. Wearing long-sleeved, goggles, and oven mitts on both entire arms, flip the cavazoons and fry for 3 more minutes on the other side.
  6. Remove from heat, lather rinse repeat until finished all the cavazoons.
  7. Enjoy, once cooled.
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I need some hot stuff
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Sittin’ here eatin’ my heart out waitin’
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Waitin’ for some lover to call
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Dialed about a thousand numbers lately
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Almost rang the phone off the wall
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Lookin’ for some hot stuff baby this evenin’
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I need some hot stuff baby tonight
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I want some hot stuff baby this evenin’
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Gotta have some hot stuff Gotta have some love tonight
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I need hot stuff
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I want some hot stuff
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I don’t know any more lyrics.

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    I hope you make and enjoy these calzones, or cavazoons!! Is this not the best bean-based dessert ever? It is. And how good is March for filled-cookie holiday celebrations? Is there another filled-cookie holiday I am missing? Please let me know so I may soon remedy that.
Also, you know we are not going to talk about calzone-like things without mentioning the most adorable king of loving calzones, Mr. Ben Wyatt.

    And after all this talk about my cavazoons, and all the work that went into them, YOU KNOW we have to watch this one as well.

orig: https://laughfrodisiac.weebly.com/my-own-creations/challenge-accepted-saint-josephs-pants-cavazoon-sweet-chickpea-calzone-happy-st-josephs-day#comments

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