{"id":6066,"date":"2013-09-16T22:47:01","date_gmt":"2013-09-16T22:47:01","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2019-04-16T12:37:24","modified_gmt":"2019-04-16T12:37:24","slug":"veganizing-friends-dr-rogers-oysters-middle-eastern-couscous-html-d2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/2013\/09\/16\/veganizing-friends-dr-rogers-oysters-middle-eastern-couscous-html-d2\/","title":{"rendered":"Veganizing “Friends”: Dr. Roger’s Oysters & Middle Eastern Couscous"},"content":{"rendered":"
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<\/span>\"Picture\"<\/a>This is how I feel about mushrooms. Also, blog namesake! <\/span><\/span> <\/p>\n

    Given the name of this website, I can’t believe it has taken me this long to make an actual aphrodisiac! Or, at least a vegan version of one. Especially when my font of wisdom, “Friends”, featured the following exchange, in the classic, hilarious episode “The One That Could Have Been”, between Monica and her alternate-reality-insanely-boring boyfriend-who-talks-about-hazelnuts-not-really-being-nuts*, Dr. Roger: <\/div>\n
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Monica:<\/strong> I hope you’re hungry. We’re starting with oysters. And y’know what they say about oysters, don’t you?
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<\/span>Dr. Roger:<\/strong> They have parasites?
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<\/span>Monica:<\/strong> No! Umm well, some people say that oysters are an aphrodisiac.
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<\/span>Dr. Roger:<\/strong> What people?
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<\/span>Monica:<\/strong> People! People say it! Come here! (She grabs him and kisses him.)
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<\/span>Dr. Roger:<\/strong> So oysters, huh?
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<\/span>Monica:<\/strong> And then we’re gonna have a little Middle Eastern couscous. Something we can eat…with our hands.
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<\/span>Dr. Roger:<\/strong> Y’know, it’s funny, but when we were studying communicable diseases…
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<\/span>Monica:<\/strong> No-no-no, no! It’s sensual!
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<\/span>Dr. Roger:<\/strong> Ohh! Didn’t know! Okay!<\/font>
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     Yeah! We’re going to make oysters (the mushroom kind!) and Middle Eastern couscous! And we’re going to eat with our hands…maybe. Nah, probably not.<\/div>\n
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      So, in case you haven’t seen it, “The One That Could Have Been” shows what the gang might be like if Ross and Carol were still married, if Monica were still fat, if Chandler had had the nerve to quit his job*, if Phoebe had taken the job at Merrill Lynch, if Rachel had married Barry, and if Joey never got fired from ‘Days of Our Lives’*. It’s absolutely hysterical, but also sweet because (spoiler!) they all end up roughly the same as they are in reality. Aw, fate. 
      Anyway, Monica is dating Dr. Roger, and she’s wondering whether she “should, ya know, give him [her] flower.” She makes him this dinner of oysters and couscous in a failed attempt to seduce him. Luckily, Chandler saves the day. Could Chandler BE any greater in this episode? (“They didn’t add the second ‘cous’ until 1979.”)
      Because we are talking about “The One That Could Have Been”, I have all the motivation I need to share one of my all-time favorite “Friends” moments, which happened to occur during this episode. It’s Fat Monica’s epic, and I mean EPIC, Dance with the Donut.  <\/div>\n
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