{"id":5873,"date":"2013-12-30T02:37:58","date_gmt":"2013-12-30T02:37:58","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2022-11-05T16:12:44","modified_gmt":"2022-11-05T16:12:44","slug":"veganizing-friends-tarletstartletstartletsthe-word-has-lost-all-meaning-html","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/2013\/12\/30\/veganizing-friends-tarletstartletstartletsthe-word-has-lost-all-meaning-html\/","title":{"rendered":"Veganizing &#8220;Friends&#8221;: Tartlets?&#8230;Tartlets?&#8230;Tartlets?&#8230;The Word Has Lost All Meaning"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"z-index: 10; position: relative; float: left; ;clear: left; margin-top: 0px; *margin-top: 0px;\"><a><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"galleryImageBorder\" style=\"border-width: 0; margin: 5px 10px 10px 0px;\" src=\"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/uploads1854185438681388368072.png\" alt=\"Picture\" \/><\/a><span class=\"wsite-caption\" style=\"display: block; font-size: 90%; margin-top: -10px; margin-bottom: 10px; text-align: center;\">Tartlets!<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"paragraph\" style=\"text-align: left; display: block;\">\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 &#8220;Well smack my ass and call me Judy!&#8221;<br \/>\nNo, I didn&#8217;t say that! It&#8217;s from one of the best guest stars ever on &#8220;Friends&#8221;, Jon Lovitz! In Season 1&#8217;s &#8220;The One With the Stoned Guy&#8221;, he played a guy named Steve who came to the apartment to interview Monica for a restaurant job. However, as Phoebe reported, he got stoned in the cab on the way over and was just a rude mess. A corn-envelope eating, Sugar-Os throwing, Gummi-Bear stealing mess. Poor Monica&#8217;s big opportunity was lost because of drugs. See? Johnny Dakota was right: &#8220;There&#8217;s no hope with dope!&#8221;*<br \/>\nLuckily for us, his erratic behavior made for some great TV. Jon Lovitz is one of those actors with the ability to turn a stupid line into an absolute instant classic. My favorite line reading of his (in this episode, at least; his reappearance in Season 9&#8217;s &#8220;The One With the Blind Dates&#8221; provides stiff competition*) inspired this post&#8217;s subject: regarding Monica&#8217;s Onion Tartlets. For the past what, 15 years, every time I hear the word tartlet, or even tart, I react in this same way. I can&#8217;t help it! Watch and be awed:<\/div>\n<hr style=\"width: 100%; clear: both; visibility: hidden;\" \/>\n<div class=\"wsite-youtube\" style=\"margin-bottom: 10px; margin-top: 10px;\">\n<div class=\"wsite-youtube-wrapper wsite-youtube-size-auto wsite-youtube-align-center\">\n<div class=\"wsite-youtube-container\"><iframe src=\"\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/WjzyAHKYJ8M?wmode=opaque\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div><!--BLOG_SUMMARY_END--><\/div>\n<div class=\"paragraph\" style=\"text-align: left;\">\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0I&#8217;ve seen this about 100 times and I still love it. The word tartlet makes me laugh so hard!! I don&#8217;t know how Courteney Cox kept a straight face during filming, because I couldn&#8217;t have. I&#8217;d be the worst sitcom actor ever. I&#8217;d break more than Jimmy Fallon. Anyway, so Steve couldn&#8217;t wait a measly 8 1\/2 minutes for the onion tartlets. He got all up in Monica&#8217;s pantry, looking for munchies.<\/div>\n<div class=\"wsite-youtube\" style=\"margin-bottom: 10px; margin-top: 10px;\">\n<div class=\"wsite-youtube-wrapper wsite-youtube-size-auto wsite-youtube-align-center\">\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p><span style=\"z-index: 10; position: relative; float: right; ;clear: right; margin-top: 0px; *margin-top: 0px;\"><a><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"galleryImageBorder\" style=\"border-width: 0; margin: 5px 0px 10px 10px;\" src=\"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/uploads1854185438681388369304.jpg\" alt=\"Picture\" \/><\/a><span class=\"wsite-caption\" style=\"display: block; font-size: 90%; margin-top: -10px; margin-bottom: 10px; text-align: center;\">&#8220;I was just being polite.&#8221;<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"paragraph\" style=\"text-align: left; display: block;\">\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0&#8220;Hello Greeter Girl.&#8221; I love it. But he&#8217;s so rude! Not only did he take items off her shelf but he actually stuck his grubby hands in and ate some of the food! I would have snapped much earlier than Monica did. I can&#8217;t stomach fools! And I really can&#8217;t stomach grubby hands in my cereal boxes. I love cereal. Let&#8217;s have cereal! No, we&#8217;re here to make onion tartlets. And wow, guys, I must say, this shit is crazy good! I used <a title=\"\" href=\"http:\/\/thevegg.com\/\">The Vegg <\/a>for the first time. If you aren&#8217;t familiar with it, The Vegg is a vegan, powdered egg replacer that is extremely, eerily egg-like. It even made my kitchen smell like sulfur! The people at The Vegg were nice enough to send me a free sample, and I think these tartlets (hehe tartlets) are a great way to experiment with a little bit of it. I am definitely going to be buying this in the future. If you don&#8217;t have access to it, I bet a mix of EnerG Egg Replacer, nooch, and black salt would substitute well (or even just the nooch and black salt if you use firm tofu). However, this concoction blew the minds of some real egg-loving omnivores in my house, so I suggest ordering the Vegg.<br \/>\nTo make the little tartlet shells, <a title=\"\" href=\"http:\/\/hellogiggles.com\/david-cross-chicken-pot-chicken-pot-chicken-pot-pie\">I stole a recipe from this really cool blogger over at HelloGiggles\u00a0<\/a>and I don&#8217;t even feel bad about it. I&#8217;m taking her method too &#8212; you use the <em>bottom part <\/em>of your muffin tin (the smaller your muffin cups, the better for this!) to form your dough into cups! It&#8217;s genius!\u00a0So, we&#8217;re going to make and semi-bake the little tartlet pie cups first, then fill them with the eggy mixture and bake again. Be careful that your crusts don&#8217;t burn (like some of mine did) as it takes a long time for the filling to cook. It might help to cover your pie edges with tin foil to prevent burning (I never do this because I love burnt edges). Weirdly, the uncooked filling tastes just like egg salad. I was always disgusted by egg salad, but the stuff without any actual eggs is pretty rad.\u00a0Let&#8217;s make some tartlets! Hehe tartlets!<\/div>\n<hr style=\"width: 100%; clear: both; visibility: hidden;\" \/>\n<div class=\"paragraph\" style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: xx-large;\">MONICA&#8217;S ONION TARTLETS<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: xx-large;\">HEHE TARTLETS<\/span><\/div>\n<div>\n<div class=\"wsite-multicol\">\n<div class=\"wsite-multicol-table-wrap\" style=\"margin: 0 -15px;\">\n<table class=\"wsite-multicol-table\">\n<tbody class=\"wsite-multicol-tbody\">\n<tr class=\"wsite-multicol-tr\">\n<td class=\"wsite-multicol-col\" style=\"width: 50%; padding: 0 15px;\">\n<div class=\"paragraph\" style=\"text-align: left;\"><span style=\"font-size: large;\"><em>For the tartlet pie cups<\/em><br \/>\n<\/span>Ingredients:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>2C all-purpose or whole-wheat flour<\/li>\n<li>1t baking powder<\/li>\n<li>1t salt<\/li>\n<li>3\/4C Earth Balance or vegan margarine<\/li>\n<li>1\/2C cold water<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Directions:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>Mix your dry ingredients in a mixing bowl.<\/li>\n<li>Cut the margarine in with a pastry cutter or your fingers. I have a pastry cutter, but I used my fingers here! Ohhh livin&#8217; on the veeedge.<\/li>\n<li>Add the water and mix into a ball, then knead well, about 15 times.<\/li>\n<li>Flatten into a disc, wrap in cling film, and refrigerate for an hour.<\/li>\n<li>Take the dough out and let thaw for 30-45 minutes before rolling out.<\/li>\n<li>Preheat your oven to 350\u00b0.<\/li>\n<li>Roll out to about 1\/4inch thick and cut into small squares that will cover the bottoms of your muffin tins.<\/li>\n<li>Bake for 10 minutes, just long enough to set the shape but not too long that they are fully cooked.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><em><span style=\"font-size: large;\">For the filling<\/span><\/em><br \/>\nIngredients:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>1 very large onion (to make about 2C diced)<\/li>\n<li>1T olive oil<\/li>\n<li>1t salt<\/li>\n<li>1 box (12 oz.) silken tofu<\/li>\n<li>5t The Vegg egg replacer powder<\/li>\n<li>salt and black pepper to taste<\/li>\n<li>3T nooch<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Directions:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>First, we&#8217;re going to caramelize the onions!! Get a big heavy stock pot, heat your oil over medium-low heat, and add your onions. Cook, stirring often, for about 30-40 minutes over medium heat, to caramelize the onions. Add a pinch of salt halfway through. You can totally just brown your onions over high heat if you don&#8217;t have the time or patience, but caramelizing onions is one of those amazing magic tricks you should learn to do someday.<\/li>\n<li>While your onions cook and then cool, mix your tofu, Vegg, salt and pepper, and nooch into a mixing bowl. Use a fork to mash the tofu. Do not puree or blend it, as it&#8217;s much more authentically egg-like when simply mashed roughly.<\/li>\n<li>Add your onions to the tofu mixture.<\/li>\n<li>Once you&#8217;ve prebaked your pie shells for 10 minutes and cooked your onions, fill each shell with the onion tofu mixture and press gently down. Put all the shells in a large glass baking dish (or two) and bake at 350\u00b0 for about 40 minutes.<\/li>\n<li>Check at 30 minutes to make sure yours aren&#8217;t burning.<\/li>\n<li>Ta daaa! Enjoy!<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<div class=\"wsite-image wsite-image-border-thin \" style=\"padding-top: 10px; padding-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0; margin-right: 0; text-align: center;\"><a> <img decoding=\"async\" style=\"width: 100%; max-width: 600px;\" src=\"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/uploads1854185438683263683_orig.jpg\" alt=\"Picture\" \/> <\/a><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; font-size: 90%;\">Thanks Vegg people!<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<div class=\"wsite-image wsite-image-border-none \" style=\"padding-top: 10px; padding-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0; margin-right: 10px; text-align: center;\"><a> <img decoding=\"async\" style=\"width: auto; max-width: 100%;\" src=\"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/uploads1854185438681388370697.jpg\" alt=\"Picture\" \/> <\/a><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; font-size: 90%;\">&#8220;Is it dry in here?&#8221;<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/td>\n<td class=\"wsite-multicol-col\" style=\"width: 50%; padding: 0 15px;\">\n<div>\n<div class=\"wsite-image wsite-image-border-none \" style=\"padding-top: 10px; padding-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0; margin-right: 0; text-align: center;\"><a> <img decoding=\"async\" style=\"width: auto; max-width: 100%;\" src=\"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/uploads1854185438681388370384.jpg\" alt=\"Picture\" \/> <\/a><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; font-size: 90%;\">THE SHADOW FINGERS WILL GET YOU, PIE DOUGH!<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<div class=\"wsite-image wsite-image-border-thin \" style=\"padding-top: 10px; padding-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0; margin-right: 0; text-align: center;\"><a> <img decoding=\"async\" style=\"width: 100%; max-width: 600px;\" src=\"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/uploads1854185438682264848_orig.jpg\" alt=\"Picture\" \/> <\/a><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; font-size: 90%;\">Thiis is howw you dooo ittt<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<div class=\"wsite-image wsite-image-border-none \" style=\"padding-top: 10px; padding-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0; margin-right: 0; text-align: center;\"><a> <img decoding=\"async\" style=\"width: auto; max-width: 100%;\" src=\"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/uploads1854185438681388370473.jpg\" alt=\"Picture\" \/> <\/a><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; font-size: 90%;\">You could also just eat the pie crusts plain.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<div class=\"wsite-image wsite-image-border-none \" style=\"padding-top: 10px; padding-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0; margin-right: 0; text-align: center;\"><a> <img decoding=\"async\" style=\"width: auto; max-width: 100%;\" src=\"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/uploads1854185438681388370498.jpg\" alt=\"Picture\" \/> <\/a><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; font-size: 90%;\">Onions overboard!!<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<div class=\"wsite-image wsite-image-border-thin \" style=\"padding-top: 10px; padding-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0; margin-right: 0; text-align: center;\"><a> <img decoding=\"async\" style=\"width: 100%; max-width: 1066px;\" src=\"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/uploads1854185438686383400_orig.jpg\" alt=\"Picture\" \/> <\/a><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; font-size: 90%;\">&#8220;You know, I don&#8217;t know what I&#8217;m looking for.&#8221;<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<div class=\"wsite-image wsite-image-border-thin \" style=\"padding-top: 10px; padding-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0; margin-right: 0; text-align: center;\"><a> <img decoding=\"async\" style=\"width: auto; max-width: 100%;\" src=\"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/uploads1854185438685058608.jpg\" alt=\"Picture\" \/> <\/a><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; font-size: 90%;\">Don&#8217;t worry it&#8217;s not really egg!<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<div class=\"wsite-image wsite-image-border-thin \" style=\"padding-top: 10px; padding-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0; margin-right: 0; text-align: center;\"><a> <img decoding=\"async\" style=\"width: 100%; max-width: 600px;\" src=\"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/uploads185418543868874984_orig.jpg\" alt=\"Picture\" \/> <\/a><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; font-size: 90%;\">Adding the onions. Onions, man.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<div class=\"wsite-image wsite-image-border-thin \" style=\"padding-top: 10px; padding-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0; margin-right: 0; text-align: center;\"><a> <img decoding=\"async\" style=\"width: 100%; max-width: 1066px;\" src=\"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/uploads1854185438687461366_orig.jpg\" alt=\"Picture\" \/> <\/a><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; font-size: 90%;\"><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"paragraph\" style=\"text-align: left;\">\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0These are actually really good! If you take the time to roll your pie dough out and cut them more carefully than I did, you could totally serve these at a dinner party. Or any kind of party. New Years Eve? Nothing like ringing in the new year with the smell of sulfur! I hope you enjoy!<\/div>\n<div>\n<div class=\"wsite-image wsite-image-border-thin \" style=\"padding-top: 10px; padding-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0; margin-right: 0; text-align: center;\"><a> <img decoding=\"async\" style=\"width: 100%; max-width: 1066px;\" src=\"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/uploads1854185438687141993_orig.jpg\" alt=\"Picture\" \/> <\/a><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; font-size: 90%;\"><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"paragraph\" style=\"text-align: left;\"><em>*What was your favorite Jon Lovitz quote on &#8220;Friends&#8221;, from either of his episodes? Don&#8217;t you love when he says, &#8220;And I&#8217;m pretty sure&#8230;I&#8217;m infertile&#8221; because I do.<\/em><br \/>\n<em>*Do you know who Johnny Dakota is?!?!<\/em><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>original comments: https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.weebly.com\/my-own-creations\/veganizing-friends-tarletstartletstartletsthe-word-has-lost-all-meaning<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Tartlets! \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 &#8220;Well smack my ass and call me Judy!&#8221; No, I didn&#8217;t say that! It&#8217;s from one of the best guest stars ever [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":5874,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[172],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.8 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Veganizing &quot;Friends&quot;: Tartlets?...Tartlets?...Tartlets?...The Word Has Lost All Meaning - Laughfrodisiac<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/2013\/12\/30\/veganizing-friends-tarletstartletstartletsthe-word-has-lost-all-meaning-html\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Veganizing &quot;Friends&quot;: Tartlets?...Tartlets?...Tartlets?...The Word Has Lost All Meaning - Laughfrodisiac\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Tartlets! \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 &#8220;Well smack my ass and call me Judy!&#8221; No, I didn&#8217;t say that! 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