{"id":5673,"date":"2014-11-28T00:11:53","date_gmt":"2014-11-28T00:11:53","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2019-04-16T16:56:13","modified_gmt":"2019-04-16T16:56:13","slug":"happy-thanksgiving-vegan-recipes-and-a-full-how-to-guidesort-of-html-d2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/2014\/11\/28\/happy-thanksgiving-vegan-recipes-and-a-full-how-to-guidesort-of-html-d2\/","title":{"rendered":"Happy Thanksgiving! Vegan Recipes and a Full How-To Guide…Sort of"},"content":{"rendered":"

<\/span>\"Picture\"<\/a><\/span><\/span> <\/p>\n

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!
<\/span>
<\/span>Even though my last  name rhymes with Pilgrim, Thanksgiving was never my favorite holiday. I hate how people focus on the actual turkey, on all the death and suffering masquerading as the central food and important ‘tradition’, rather than making it just about being with people you love. (Or despise.) But I loved being with my family and playing games and laughing a lot. And of course sneaking vegan sides and desserts into the mix! This year, I’m not with my family. I’m not even in America for chrissakes! But we’re still celebrating Thanksgiving. I miss not having lots of people around, but I do get to have my first entirely<\/em> vegan Thanksgiving dinner! Yay!!
<\/span><\/div>\n
<\/hr>\n
\n

<\/div>\n

\n
\n
\n \"Picture\"
\n <\/a><\/p>\n
<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
Apparently the Brits are willing to make me smile today, because not only are the Thanksgiving episodes of “How I Met Your Mother” playing on TV, but the commercials they just ran during them showed Philly City Hall AND the American show “Paternity Court”! The caption said “You’re the father” and the guy just FAINTED flat out! It was the best thing.
<\/span>
<\/span> Anyway, I made tons of food over the past few days, mostly things I’ve never made before. Thanksgiving is about tradition and making the same stuff every year? F that! This is your chance to be a vegan chef all-star and show off. Okay you can do that with the same old favorites I guess. I’m sorry, ‘favourites’.
<\/span>
<\/span> First, the most important thing to decide is what you’ll be having for dessert. Then work up the rest of the meal from there! It’s like how people choose their shoes first and then plan the rest of their outfit. (Does anybody actually do that?) You’ll have to make it to the end of this post to see our treasure treats. 
<\/span><\/div>\n
\n
\n
\n \"Picture\"
\n <\/a><\/p>\n
Or I guess I’ll just share the picture now. <\/div><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
Next, you want to check off the important sides. Do you want mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, stuffing? All three? I would have made all three if it wasn’t going to just be my husband and me for dinner. I decided on mashed potatoes, garlicked. 
<\/span>
<\/span><\/div>\n
\n
\n
\n \"Picture\"
\n <\/a><\/p>\n
<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
Do you want to eat greens this year? I did, so I roasted some Brussels sprouts in olive oil and pink salt. The best is that there were literally 8 sprouts in the package I bought. It’s like the most paltry showing of vegetables at any meal ever. <\/p>\n<\/div>\n
\n
\n
\n \"Picture\"
\n <\/a><\/p>\n
Good evening, TWO Brussels sprouts<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
Which gravy will you make? Is it a mushroom-based gravy? Is it from a recipe or something you wing? For me, it’s the Punk Rock Chickpea Gravy from “Vegan with a Vengeance”, with extra soy and nooch, and with butterbeans because the chickpeas in England DO NOT MASH. I tried mashing chickpeas here and the little f-ers evaded the pressure Every. Single. Time. Then I tried just squeezing them to death with my hands and they POPPED OUT ACROSS THE ROOM. And I am pretty strong. I just…the chickpeas here are possessed.
<\/span><\/div>\n
\n
\n
\n \"Picture\"
\n <\/a><\/p>\n
<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
More sides more sides! If I had my druthers I would probably say druthers more and then have made some kind of kale thing. But luckily, Husband requested the green bean casserole of his younger days. Now, I realize that so many of you have had green bean casserole at every single Thanksgiving dinner with your families. It’s like a huge thing right? I never even heard of it until Isa posted a recipe on the PPK a few years ago. I know! But Husband’s family always had it so I had to make it even though green beans roasted in mushroom soup sounds revolting. I planned on using Isa’s recipe but couldn’t find vegan mushroom soup for the life of me, so my friend Elli (who is too cool for blogging) helped me out. Recipe below<\/strong>!! And guess what….it’s freaking AMAZING. Convert over here. <\/p>\n

<\/span>Then, what’s your main?! Will you make the famous chickpea cutlets? (Yes.) Or did you buy a Tofurky roast in America where it costs like $8 and not like here where the high street Whole Foods sells them for THIRTY FREAKING POUNDS?? (That is about $100 dollars.) Even if you gave me the money for that, I could not stomach buying it for that price. Even if Donald Trump himself was like, I’m kind of an ass, but here’s a million dollars; you must spend it on overpriced Tofurky. Okay maybe then I would. Unless the money smelled like cheese.
<\/span>
And then make cranberry sauce. No one eats it, right, but if it’s not there it pisses off Santa or something. Also, making it from scratch makes all your pots and stirrer majiggies a beautiful deep pink through the next few uses.
<\/span>
<\/span> OH OH and biscuits!! You can make pumpkin biscuits if you want. I guess that would make sense. But this year I veganized Alton Brown’s perfect regular southern biscuit recipe and they are delicious. Recipe below!<\/strong>
<\/span>
<\/span> So if you followed my instructions? guidelines? stream-of-consciousness blogging style that we all have learned to love\/deal with? you now have a killer menu that would impress even the pickiest omnivore on this oh so special American day! This was my menu. I made all of it from scratch!! So proud!
<\/span><\/p>\n