{"id":5552,"date":"2015-12-31T23:33:27","date_gmt":"2015-12-31T23:33:27","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2019-04-16T12:37:14","modified_gmt":"2019-04-16T12:37:14","slug":"it-is-impossible-to-roll-cakes-but-lets-make-a-yule-log-html-d2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/laughfrodisiac.com\/2015\/12\/31\/it-is-impossible-to-roll-cakes-but-lets-make-a-yule-log-html-d2\/","title":{"rendered":"It Is Impossible to Roll Cakes, But Let’s Make a Yule Log!"},"content":{"rendered":"

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   Some people might say that Yule logs – rolled up filled cakes, similar to jelly rolls but with a stump – are only for Christmas. Nothing says seasons greetings like a hacked tree stump, especially when it’s made of icing and food coloring. My intention with this post was to jollily say, ‘Hey I disagree! Yule logs can be for an anytime party, especially New Year’s Eve!’ But alas, I now firmly believe Yule logs are for never. FOR NEVER. <\/div>\n
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   First of all, how do you even. If you made an edible or even delicious cake, as I am wont to do, then why do things that will 99% guaranteed destroy it? Why not just eat it? It’s probably going to crack if you try to roll it up. That’s because it’s not a stone cold piece of crap cake that you could have built in shop class. I’ve heard that it may be easier to roll cakes while they’re still warm; that might prevent crackage. BUT then you can’t add the filling because it’ll melt! So what the hell is the point! Is it even worth it? Why not just have a regular old frosted cake? It saves you the anguish but tastes and looks just as good. Why do we do this to ourselves? Regardless of that last question posed, I do expect you to make this. I want to know how it goes and how badly yours falls apart. Also, the recipes are f-ing delicious, if I do say so myself and oh I just did so there we go. Great cake, great filling. I’d be so happy with myself if I didn’t have a disintegrating pile of broken cake on my stove right now.
    Maybe you think my New Year’s resolution should be to learn how to do this better, become a master at rolling cakes so my next related post might be an actual tutorial to help others who want to success at tree stump cakes. But no. I don’t believe in rolled cakes anymore. I’m also not going to improve my food photography, in case you were going to ask. Ain’t nobody got time for that. <\/div>\n

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    I decided to make a gingerbread-ish vanilla cake to go with this fancymazing chestnut puree we found at Fortnum & Mason, which I think is the English version of Williams Sonoma, probably with its own ludicrous holiday catalog (for ludichristmas, as I like to say). We went sometime in November or December, which you should never do because it is wall-to-wall tourists taking pictures and buying $18 jars filled with 4 shortbread cookies. (Remember that’s in pounds.) But the saving grace of this experience was finding vanilla-scented chestnut puree in this adorable little tin. It was pretty cheap too, considering where we were and how much they could have charged. We always buy little interesting foodstuffs, usually when traveling, and then forget to use them before they expire, or we even actively try to ‘save’ them for the right occasion which also leads to forgetting to use them. Such dumb! So waste! With this little chestnut tin, I decided early on to use it…early on.<\/span><\/div>\n
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   I figured New Year’s Eve would be a great time to celebrate with a special chestnut-puree-filled cake, since we decided in advance that we’d be homebodying and what better activity for homebodying than eating a ginormous cake with two kinds of frosting? These recipes really are delicious, so I highly recommend making that as a standard iced sheet cake one day. After you try rolling this shiz.<\/div>\n
VANILLA GINGERBREAD YULE LOG CAKE WITH CHESTNUT CREAM FILLING <\/font><\/div>\n
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For the cake<\/em>
Ingredients<\/u>:<\/p>\n
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This is the salt I use in all my dessert baking now. It’s so good and interesting!<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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For the buttercream (to cover the rolled log)<\/em>
This is where it got even funnier. I was planning to make a tofu mousse to top it with, but when I went to add my soft tofu to the bowl of whipped butter, shortening, and icing sugar, I saw that my tofu expired. Normally I’d be like eh whatevs, but it expired 3 months ago. I think it’s safer not to risk a 3 month incubation period. So my buttercream base for mousse became just over-liquefied buttercream. Here’s the recipe but with less cream than I used because liquid. <\/span>
    Whip until smooth:<\/span><\/p>\n