Zhangye Danxia, China: The "One Beautiful Place in West of China"by Randi / September 4, 2017
It’s unclear when exactly we should say we began our exploration of the ancient Silk Road, not one road so much as a cross-continental network of trade routes and passes from China, across most of central Asia, and possibly all the way to Rome. (Sea routes stretching from Indonesia to Africa were also part of it, but we didn’t do any watersports; it’s all desert from here on out.) Xi’an was considered a terminus of it, but today it’s such a modern busy city that it didn’t seem very ‘Silk Road-y’ to us when we were there; we were still in ‘China’ mindset and not ‘incredible desert history’ mindset. But there’s no question that once we landed in Dunhuang, our journey through the Silk Road had begun. Dunhuang was one of the most important historical sites of the Silk Road both then and now, and it has provided tons of insight into the dealings and relationships among people, religious groups, and states from ancient times. If you go to Dunhuang, you are unquestionably there to go back in time and learn about its role in the Silk Road.
So, like I said, the Silk Road was not a road, and not even just because of mountains! It was formed by local traders determining which routes they could travel without dying of thirst, pretty much, and mainly went from one oasis to another. It also included the least deadly mountain passes, though you had to be careful of the season (snow!). Also, contrary to the idea that individual traders ventured from China all the way to Europe, most evidence shows that traders stuck to their local routes, like a very extended game of telephone but for trading. Or I guess a more appropriate comparison would be to the track and field race where you pass the baton. At camp we called it the…I wanna say Fenchurch Street but that’s just because I miss my tube line. Um…steeple chase! That’s it! (Those are similar phrases, right.) Is that a thing people say or is it just passing the baton? Whatever. It was like that where you go just a bit of the way yourself and then pass your crap to an associate or new trader friend. So the romantic notion of traders with endless caravans crossing the desert with innumerable treasures to bring to western Europe is not very accurate.
But actually, the idea of the Telephone game works too, because these traders shared information of all sorts with each other that blended into new cultures, traversing the continent and beyond along with the silk, but also with all kinds of other goods, animals, cultural and religious ideas, and Yom Kippur breath. The most important item passed throughout the lands was not silk but paper – documents, books, and even scattered personal notes are what teach us the most about this history and how people traded and what spread successfully and how far it went. And while there are many famous Silk Road sites that have provided immense knowledge through excavations, we’ve learned the most about this spread of communication and ideas (and goods) from one place – Dunhuang, and its Library Cave.
Dunhuang is an oasis town in Gansu province, squeezed in between the Gobi Desert (yes we made our way allll the way back around) and the Taklamakan Desert (fuck it was SO DRY my eyes hurt in my head). An important early Silk Road city, it’s now known for its outstanding Mogao Caves, an extensive cave system that served as Buddhist temples and housed (and still house) incredible examples of religious Buddhist art – in fact, the largest collection of Buddhist art in the world (painted on the cave walls, mostly). Constructed for meditation spaces in the 4th century, the caves were not well preserved (and still aren’t very) so what there is to see is pretty miraculous. No pictures are allowed inside the tiny dark caves – great idea to try to preserve what’s there, although some caves were closed due to ‘excessive carbon dioxide’ (meaning they aren’t regulating the number of visitors well enough. Also, smoking is allowed. If you have a problem with air quality and too many people affecting the condition of the cave preservation, maybe don’t allow smoking in there FFS, CHINA).
In addition to the art, the Mogao caves gave the world its most important contribution to history with the Library Cave, a hidden room in the caves which was walled up to hide thousands and thousands of documents – in fact, over 50,000 documents, including over 15,000 books and over 1000 scrolls. Some scrolls date from as early as the 5th century and all dated from before the cave was sealed in the 11th century. The earliest complete printed book was found here, The Diamond Sutra, from 868. The documents are in at least 17 languages, including Chinese, Tibetan, Uigur, Hebrew, Sanskrit, and Sogdian, proving how far peoples and ideas travelled.
The walled-up cave was discovered in 1900 by a monk known as Daoist Wang, at least according to the book I’m reading (Z’s book calls him something a lot less fun). Daoist Wang was self-appointed as the caretaker of Dunhuang when it had long been falling into disrepair. One day he noticed something going on with the air in them there caves and knocked an inner wall down, and found a room positively crammed with piles of documents stretching 10 feet tall. Hoo boy, this was a big deal, and he knew it. He asked the Chinese government if they wanted to pay for him to have all the documents shipped – he knew how important these were to Chinese history – and the govvies were like nah we don’t have the money to pay for that. Big mistake. Big. Huge. An explorer named Aurel Stein soon heard about the discovery and made his way to Dunhuang to charm Wang into letting him buy some of the documents and take them out of China (to Britain and India). Stein gave Wang like a Benjamin, maybe two, and took TENS of thousands of documents. He is a controversial figure, for many reasons. One, he knew they were worth more, but like, so did Wang, and Wang could have charged more. Also what was Wang gonna do with that money he lived in caves. Two, people are mad at Whitey McSteinface for taking the documents away from their home (are you too good for your HOME?), but the Chinese government wasn’t interested at first so why not bring them to a place with better preservation methods and people and universities who actually want to study them? (NB, you’d think this string of me siding with colonialist kinds of thinking would mean I side with the British Museum on the Elgin Marbles controversy but I saw IN PERSON the whole f-ing modern advanced thing that Greece has since built for them so there’s no reason now! Shaaame!)
Aurel Stein was also the first person to describe in great detail everything he saw at the Dunhuang caves (see it’s historically necessary to describe everything you see and do in too much detail, for posterity!), and contributed most of what we know about how they were before the onslaught of other explorers, researchers, universities…and tourists. Today, foreigners can’t really book tickets. The website doesn’t have functional English, but also I think hotels and hostels and tour groups just do it for foreigners and there’s no discussion. But you do need to book tickets in advance, because they only let in 6000 tourists per day – and it REALLY should be less, considering the aforementioned CO2 problems harming various caves. We hired a guide and driver from VisitOurChina to get our tickets, pick us up and drop us off at our guesthouse, and provide a private tour of the caves. Well, 2 out of 3 ain’t bad, I guess. No, they are a bad company and I strongly urge you never to use them. The local guide they hired for us was great, but what they didn’t tell us (and I don’t think she realized we had paid (through the nose) for) was that private guides cannot lead anyone through the caves – you are put into large (LARGE) groups with other (AWFUL LOUD RUDE) tourists and led around by an official site guide. So we paid all that money for nothing. We were livid, and not just because the huge Italian tour group we were put with was full of rude awful people who snuck photos in the caves despite that being prohibited. I know, Italians betraying me, my own people.
I do not take that shit lightly and we got a partial refund of our money, but if we didn’t have to deal with the excruciatingly frustrating Chinese tendency to deny blame and never apologize and make things as hard as possible (and also, what contract law?!), I would have fought for all of it. YOU HEAR ME, SOPHY? YOU ARE A LYING LIAR WHO LIES AND YOU HAVE TAINTED THE NAME OF TOY GIRAFFES EVERYWHERE.
Despite my blood pressure being at red alert the whole visit, both at our being cheated and at my own people betraying me with insane rudeness, our visit to the Mogao Caves was pretty special. You start in a newly built visitor center and you watch two movies, one about the caves’ history and one about the visit. I mean at least I think that’s what they were about. It was dark and comfy and cool in there and I had a very nice nap.
After the movies, you get on a giant bus to the actual caves. We did not know about this. It’s a 15 minute bus ride away from the visitor center to the caves, down a freaking highway! WHY NOT BUILD YOUR NEW VISITOR CENTER A TINY BIT CLOSER TO THE ACTUAL THING WE ARE VISITING? FFS CHINA.
Then you find out your tour company is a bunch of lying liars and you fight but can’t do anything about it because the official site guides are the only ones with keys to the caves (they remain locked at all times except the few minutes you are in them) so you piss and moan like an impotent jerk and then you acquiesce and try to enjoy the damn thing. And it was indeed amazing. The paintings on the cave walls are of varying degrees of preservation, some barely visible, but some (a lot) are gorgeous and clearly visible still. It’s pretty awesome. It’s also very very hot (SANDWICHED BETWEEN TWO DESERTS I SAID) so bring water and a hat and whatever you have that might reflect the sun away from you. My hands have aged so much I can hear them saying “Muriel? Muriel hasn’t lived here for 50 yeeeeears…”
We spent probably 3 hours between both the sites of the cave complex. After we got back to our guesthouse, we wanted to go into the desert to see the enormous dunes and the famous oasis of Crescent Lake, about a 30 minute walk away. Unfortunately, my dry eye syndrome has been exacerbated, to say the least, in this climate, resulting in ocular migraines like I’ve never had before, so I had to take my contacts out and lay in the dark for a while while Z explored what he said (so meanly) was the most amazing place. He took good pictures but I’m so mad I had to miss this. Stupid dry climate.
SAND EVERYWHERE
Once I could stand the pain, I realized it was like 9pm and I was hungry, so I went into our little fake adobe village to find food. Oh so we stayed at a place called the Silk Road Yododo Inn, a hostelish guesthouse with one nice woman and a very rude man working, nice rooms, but the common spaces were just enormous sandboxes. Not joking, the space in the middle of the guestrooms was all sandbox. Complete with little plastic shovel. It was insane. The room seemed nice but we saw later that it was dirtier than it first appeared, with sand in the sheets (blech) (but of course; it was a sandbox) and dirty walls and quilts. Outside, a bar played super loud music until midnight. And when that music finally stopped, a neighbor down the hall seemed to be hammering into the wall. I think he was moving furniture because Z saw a man carrying a vanity table or something absolutely ridiculous even disregarding the time of night. We can never get away from ridiculous. The guesthouse was on the second floor of a sandy adobe village looking place. So weird but cute.
the ground outside was sandbox too
I thought I might have good luck at the Western Restaurant (full name) but no, they did not speak English or understand my phone asking for no meat (what do you mean no meat! Okay I bring you chicken). I got them to bring me a bowl of rice covered in bok choy, which is better than nothing. The next day, we went to a little food shack hole in the wall place and got delicious noodles and veggies. Shacks are always better, we are learning.
yummiest shack food
Overall, despite my eyes and my head and my eyes in my head and the lying liars who lied to us, our short visit to Dunhuang was nice – very informative and interesting. We are lucky to have gotten to see some of the amazing caves and their art from so long ago, even if most of documents are back home in the British Museum (where we are members, lol). The history here is incredible and it was exciting to begin the real Silk Road section of our journey. Even if it mostly means dry air and burnt skin.
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A Wondrous Place For Me & Yucatan: Valladolid, Chichen Itza, & Our Fave Cenotes
Living in London, we missed good Mexican food so much that we decided to take an epic trip to Mexico earlier this summer. Okay, we had other reasons too but the food, man, the food is incredible (and so easy for vegans)! So are the sights! And everything else! We had the best darn time making our way through the Yucatan and Mexico City. Today we’ll take a look at the first part of our trip: the Yucatan by way of Valladolid. In this section of our trip, before moving on to Merida, we saw the amazing ruins of Ek Balam and Chichen Itza, plus our favorite thing in Mexico (besides the food), the cenotes (natural sinkholes for swimming (“I call it my swimming hole”)).
Husbo and I had surprisingly never been to Mexico before this trip, surprisingly because we are from the USA and it seemed like everyone else we knew had at least been to Puerto Vallarta with their families or Cancun on spring break. Even drunk on a dare you make it to Cancun! Since we now live farther away, we had to make the most of this chance to see Mexico, a place I feel like it goes without saying is, like anywhere, in large part wonderful and nothing at all like Cheeto Mussolini would have you believe but a lot of things you hope go without saying nowadays do have to be said so alas I said it. We only had about 8 days, but we packed each day to the brim with activities, sights, and fun. And guacamole.
The first big decision, after the “We’re going to Mexico!” one, was deciding what we had time to properly see. It was hard to cross Tulum, the most popular Mexican beach right now for seemingly everyone on Instagram who loves green smoothies and yoga (hi), off the list, but it was more important for us to finally see the wondrous ancient ruins of the Yucatan than to lounge on the beach. We’re not really lounge-y people anyway, and we are definitely ‘climb around ancient ruins in 100 degree heat so you have something to complain about’ people. Well at least I am. You know I love complaining. So that meant four days in the Yucatan to see Chichen Itza, Uzmal, and other ruins we’d come to know and love along with our new best friend: the cenote. Then after a short flight, we’d spend four days in Mexico City, what the cool kids call CDMX, and seeing all those sights, eating all their food, and making lots of new dog friends! It’s a plan!
We flew into Cancun airport and immediately got the hell out of there. Well, not immediately – between baggage delays and the UNACCEPTABLE rental car delays (they kept taking Mexican customers who arrived well after us blahhh) it was two hours from landing till driving away – but after we were immediately greeted by guys with carts selling neon yardstick spring-break-resort-style drinks and dozens and dozens of resort representatives, we were like mmm bye. We are not rave-going people and even the Cancun airport is very much PARTAYYYY TIME! I mean I guess they know their main audience.
I’m really happy I brought a sandwich from Baltimore (where we were flying from) for the 3 hour-ish flight, because I didn’t see many options in the Cancun airport and we had a whole day of driving ahead of us. When we stopped to get gas, we did go a little nuts at the gas station convenience store buying more water (gotta drink that water!) fruit, chips (gotta eat that salt when you drink that water!), and my new favorite thing ever – lime & chili peanuts. Mexico does lime and/or chili everything better than anyone and it’s amazing.
The drive out of Quintana Roo and through the Yucatan was often lovely, shady with trees, with few other cars on the road until we got closer to the city of Valladolid. The city is the third largest in the state, with 45k+ residents at the time of the last census. I loved the vibe of Valladolid – relaxed, comfortable, and culturally old-fashioned in a nice way). At least that’s how it seemed to this tourist who was there one night and one night only and is about to say a whole bunch of things that, as usual, would probably make more knowledgeable folks and residents wince. And that, my dudes, brings us to the latest edition of:
Valladolid, named after the same named city in Spain (the capital when the Mexi version was founded, in 1543), was actually originally placed a bit aways from its current location, by a lagoon. That sounds lovely, sure, but the Spanish settlers soon realized stagnant water + heat = mosquitoes and humidity but yeah mostly mosquitoes and they were NOT having it (I mean I wouldn’t either) and they made authorities literally just move the entire city. I’ve never identified so hard with Spanish settlers.
Of course, settlers are bad and do bad things, so when the city moved, it displaced more Maya people and their buildings (they wanted those stones). The Mayan revolted, but, as always happens to the indigenous people, lost. Some bullshit. Almost 300 years later, the Mayan people revolted again, and after a noble was killed, the revolt grew and grew into legit battles and became a key location of Yucatan’s Caste War, when the native Maya all over the Yucatan revolted against the European descendants. The war lasted more than 50 years, ending due to occupation by the Mexican army. There were some reforms that addressed some of the problems, but tensions and violence persisted.
So, clearly, this is the perfect place to begin our lighthearted tourism! No, it is important to learn the history of any place you travel to, and we learned a great deal about the indigenous cultures throughout our trip, especially in Merida. Today, Valladolid is a charming and peaceful place that’s celebrated for its traditional architecture, lovely surroundings, dedication to craftsmanship, and its perfect location for accessing the big sites. It’s so special that it’s been named a Pueblo Magico of Mexico, or Magic City. Approved!
We arrived in the city late that first day after an afternoon of driving (and waiting for the car, yes I’m still mad) and checked in to the Hotel Meson del Marques, a charming (everything is charming here), sprawling, traditional hotel right off the main square of the town. Most importantly, it has a pool. When you go to Mexico in the summer, you need to make sure every place you stay has a pool. We spent almost zero time here, as we left early the next morning for our jam-packed day of sight-seeing (you’ll see; it’s like the fullest day ever), but we liked what time we did have.
After doing my #1 thing to do after a flight no matter how long it is (shower), we explored our one evening in this – say it with me – charming little city. The central square is definitely the highlight, full of locals, tourists, touts, food stalls, and general happy vibes.
we went in just to take this picture
we were on our way to dinner so I also prayed that our restaurant of choice was open
Our chosen restaurant for our only night in Valladolid was the wonderful Yerbabuena de Sisal, located in the trendy Sisal neighborhood near the above-shown convent and colorful Valladolid sign. Yerbabuena is the CUTEST DARN restaurant and is vegan-friendly. It’s not vegetarian, but they have plenty of exciting vegan offerings, delicious juices, and picture-worthy decor.
We were beyond excited for our first guacamole of the trip, and theirs did not disappoint. (I mean, I don’t think it’s possible to have less-than-stellar guacamole when in Mexico.) We were also delighted to find that Yerbabuena had the vegan-friendly Yucatan staple dip of sizil pak, a traditional Mayan pumpkin seed dip. SO GOOD!
Even though they didn’t have the vegan lasagna (they don’t have it till 8pm and we arrived at 7pm because we are not cool enough to eat at normal times in any Spanish-speaking locale, apparently), I was after Mexican food anyway (it’s literally why we came here) and I was thrilled to have tamales! I love tamales! These were great!
As you can see, it came with a side salad. Mexico, as you know if you’ve heard any lazy jokes from the past 50 years, is famous for giving tourists some tumtum troubs, and we knew to stay away from raw veg and unwashed produce in general. However, I had a feeling that if any restaurant were safe to trust, it was Yerbabuena. I’m happy to report I did not get sick! And I got to have a salad! My happiest day. (I wrote in my notes from this dinner: “I am eating the side salad make sure to note on the blog if I get sick or not!” I did not!) I get the tumtums super easily so I am confident in reporting that the salad here is safe for all.
We really pushed our luck on our first meal in Mexico, hilariously, because we also broke the other main rule about eating in this country: we had drinks with ice! They were amazing juices, one chaya (a spinach-like green we would have a lot this trip, loves it) with pineapple, and one tejate, a juice from the cocoa flower.
With its amazing food, including must-try traditional dishes like sizal pak and tamales and tejate and chaya and guacamole and really everything we had omg it was so delicious, plus safe-for-our-weak-stomachs salad AND ice, I wholeheartedly recommend dining at Yerbabuena when you visit Valladolid and the Yucatan.
After our yucatangfastic (omg sorry) dinner, we strolled through the city center again and saw what we would learn is a staple of nights all across the Yucatan: enormous dance parties in the street. But the fun adorable kind, full of older Mexicans dancing and playing music and having a jolly time while the nearby sidewalks are packed to the gills with people watching. It was so sweet.
On the way home, we also found incredible paletas, frozen fruit popsicles. I had my first and probably the best one ever. This was watermelon, and it was literally just perfect sweet frozen watermelon juice. Ugh so perfect, especially with the background of YA books in Spanish (I see you Bajo La Misma Estrella, trying to make me cry!).
It was a pretty great first night in the Yucatan, and our last relaxed segment of the entire trip. We had shit to do!!
After a decent night’s sleep and a very nice plate of fruit for breakfast, the next day we enjoyed the busiest and best day.
EK BALAM
Ek Balam is about a 30 minute drive from Valladolid. It often gets overlooked as tourists concentrate on the big kahuna, Chichen Itza, and the next biggest kahuna, Uxmal, but you must make room in your schedule for a visit to Ek Balam as well. It doesn’t require too much time – you could probably spend only an hour if you are pressed – but it is definitely a worthwhile starting point on your ruinous journey.
I’m like already tired
Ek Balam was the seat of a Mayan kingdom dating back to 1000 BCE, now a Yucatec-Mayan archaeological site. King Ukit Tan Lek Tok, who ruled during the height of this city’s power in 770 to about 800 AD, is buried in the Acropolis.
We got to Ek Balam early, and I suggest doing the same because you can climb all over (most of) the pyramids and structures here and you want to beat the heat and the crowds. It makes sense to see Ek Balam and Chichen Itza on the same day, so you may be thinking that it’s better to get to the big one early and have a better experience there. However, you can’t climb the structures at Chichen Itza anymore, so beating the heat for that reason is not applicable. Also, Chichen Itza is the biggest tourist attraction in this entire state – meaning, you will never beat the crowds. It’s always crowded. With Ek Balam, if you arrive early you might be one of only a handful there, so at least you will get one set of ruins almost to yourself! (Also, Chichen Itza is enormous in comparison, so the everpresent crowds, even in the afternoon, are never really a problem. You’ll see later!)
There are 45 structures at Ek Balam, but a lot of them are smaller and/or not permissible to climb so it seems smaller than it sounds, especially compared to the other sites. The big climbing challenge is the main structure, the Acropolis, and even if it wasn’t 100 degrees out it would be hard.
(Oh, side note: Yes I am talking about temperatures in Fahrenheit, obviously, because I am smart. Americans rightly get a lot of shit for their systems of measurement, and for the most part it’s deserved. Sure the metric system makes more sense than the random number of feet in a mile. But I will never stop arguing that Fahrenheit is such a better system for measuring weather temperatures than Celsius. Oh sure in Celsius your temps for the freezing and boiling of water are easy to remember (0 and 100) but that’s not the kind of information you’re after when discussing WEATHER. Fahrenheit has a wider number range for temperatures we actually use in average normal weather (below 0 to over 100F in a normal year in my city, versus what, -10 to 40C?? what is that nonsense), so you get more information from that number than you do in Celsius. It’s much more precise. I need everyone to stop lumping our use of Fahrenheit for weather into the ‘Americans can’t measure shit’ debate because the argument for Celsius when it comes to weather does not exist. This is the hill I will die on.)
Or maybe this is the hill I will die on – at least I was terrified I would:
Climbing up this monstrosity is a lot of fun (it’s fun to climb things!), but like all the giant pyramids and ruins we’d encounter on this trip, coming down is TERRIFYING. It’s so steep and the steps are so narrow and you are just going like straight down and omg it’s forking frightening. I went down a lot of these steps sitting down. It’s just safer. Omg I am so scared again looking at it. Fun story, so I climbed it, said yee haw, and made my way miraculously back down. But then I saw how cool the pictures we took of Z sitting on the steps looked, so I climbed back up and took some of those (like the one below) at different points on the stairs. Then I miraculously tempted fate and got safely down again and thanked the Mayan gods.
And this perspective lets you see how forkign steep this was, since you can’t even seen the steps I mean man
But THEN, when we were both on sacred ground again, we realized we forgot to take a selfie at the top, a thing we like to do when we climb things. So up again I went, for the third time, and down again I came, thinking that ‘third time’s the charm’ would mean something bad for me, but luckily I made it and please do not make me climb it again.
Aside from my terrors, it was a pretty great morning. Ek Balam costs 413 pesos (very typical for these sites) (about $20) and it’s cash only. As is the case with most tourist attractions in the Yucatan, there will be guys (yoots) hanging out in the parking lot who will offer to watch your car while you tour the site, for 20-30 pesos. Of course this is a scam, but you do it, okay? They really do watch your car and if you say no they will probably, um, not. So just suck it up and pay them, it’s fine.
CENOTES
After our climby climby morning at Ek Balam, we enjoyed my absolute favorite part of this trip: the cenotes. A cenote is a natural sinkhole formed from the collapse of bedrock, exposing groundwater underneath. The ancient Maya may have used these for sacrificial offerings but luckily I didn’t know that until after we swam in a bunch of them because ew and oh no. I got to enjoy these for what they were to me: beautiful natural swimming pools, one of my favorite things (pools in general; considering my favorite smell is the chlorine of indoor pools the ‘beautiful’ or ‘natural’ element isn’t required but it was definitely a perk here).
Our first stop was the Cenote X’keken, which I can’t even describe how I’m saying wrongly in my head let alone how to properly say it, I’m sorry. (Is it like schnecken?? now I want schnecken.) This cenote is well signed since it’s pretty popular. Going to Schnecken alone is 80 pesos, but a combined ticket with another cenote on the same grounds is 125. If you are short on cash, just the one is fine and you probably won’t swim in both anyway.
The cool/crazy thing about X’Keken is that it’s completely underground. The guards will point you through the grounds, past a semi-abandoned sort of circular mall with bathrooms and changing rooms and, luckily, one lady renting towels outside (we paid 30 pesos), and over to a hidden staircase leading underground into literally the bat cave. The cave is, indeed, filled with bats. It’s so freaking cool! The bats keep to themselves flitting around the roof of the cave so you don’t have to worry about them bothering you or anything.
As you can see it’s pretty big, and even with a crowd it doesn’t feel crowded. It was pretty awesome! Everyone just leaves their stuff along the sides of the rock, but of course leave whatever you can in your car.
After our little schnecken swim, we drove about an hour to my favorite place: the Yokdzonot Cenote. This location has my favorite cenote, as well as a great restaurant. And best of all, it’s also a women’s collective, run by the local women of the community. Entry only costs 80 pesos and it’s the most beautiful cenote ever.
We timed our day perfectly so we arrived at Yokzdonot (or as I say in my head without wanting to, yoka deez nuts (I am sorry)) for lunch. We learned about this place and their ability to make vegan food from a PPK friend (the best and og vegan forum, never to be surpassed never to be forgotten), and sure enough they brought me this very nice plate of steamed nopales (cactus), nicely flavored rice, refried black beans, cabbage slaw, and a whole plate of soft tortillas so I could wrap everything up in my own special messy way. We also of course got guacamole, which was great.
After we ate, we changed in the changing rooms + bathrooms that are right off the restaurant space, and then put everything we didn’t need back in the car, which was a little annoying to keep walking out to but so what who cares. And then we went swimming in the best cenote!
At first, I was annoyed at the rule that everyone who enters the cenote must wear a lifejacket, but honestly it ended up being good because I was pretty tired from the heat by this point and it was nice to just float and relax and enjoy the scenery without worrying about drowning. This was such a lovely experience, and luckily it wasn’t too crowded for most of our visit. Yokadeeznuts is not the kind of place that can accommodate big bus tour groups, fortunately, but more and more people seem to be discovering it. I’m so glad we had a relatively chill time here. I love this place so much.
After one of the most relaxing experiences in recent memory, we went back to the car, grabbed our clothes, went back to the restaurant, changed back into (gross, sorry) clothes, and girded our loins for the big forking thing.
CHICHEN ITZA
Chichen Itza was one of the largest Mayan cities, built in approximately 600 AD, actually not that long ago in the scheme of ancient ruins. A variety of architectural styles decorate the site, suggesting that the population here was more diverse than the rest of the Mayan world. A cenote on the site (not swimmable, sadly) was likely used for sacrificial purposes – as you learn pretty much everything in the ancient Mayan world was.
The famous pyramid, El Castillo, is also called the Temple of Kukulcan. Kukulcan was a Mayan feathered serpent god like the Aztec’s Quetzalcoatl, the inspiration for Wetzel’s Pretzels. You are no longer allowed to climb El Castillo, which, ya know, fine by me.
Like I said before, Chichen Itza is always crowded, so instead of futilely trying to beat the crowds or the heat, we decided to do the opposite on both counts and go late afternoon, so that we would finish exploring the site at its closing time. (Just under two hours was, surprisingly, more than enough time for us, and we usually take forever.) This sounds like the opposite of anyone’s advice for seeing any place, but honestly it was a great move! The site is ENORMOUS – so much more than the famous pyramid that we took 1000s of photos of – and goes on for miles. So, the crowd disperses fairly quickly and it doesn’t feel crowded at all. It’s especially spacious around El Castillo and the Great Ball Court (oh, we will learn about the games that happen in these ball courts in the Uxmal/Merida post, just you wait).
that’s a safe bet for anything you see in these sites
Entry to Chichen Itza is 480 pesos per person, and you have to pay in cash. I know you’ve seen information that says it accepts card, but they will tell you it’s cash only. And if you persist, they will tell you you can pay the main fee by card, but you still need to pay the 75 peso “federal fee” portion of the price in cash regardless, so it’s all annoying and just expect to pay cash everywhere even though the touts selling tees and tchotchkes inside the grounds have card payment capacity. At least there are toilets inside the grounds as well as in the entrance hall!
El Castillo and all of Chichen Itza was pretty incredible. I’m so glad I got to see it. I am so lucky and grateful that I got to see all of these spectacular places that I knew mythologically for so long, and I fully do not believe that all of this happened in one day. What a day! Once we closed down Chichen Itza, we got back in the car for the long drive to Merida, where our next adventure awaits.
Yekaterinburg to Irkutsk: Three Days of Train
June 29 – July 2
Dear little baby laptop diary,
I titled this post after one of the most random Broadway plays I’ve ever seen, “Three Days of Rain”, with Julia Roberts making her lackluster debut, Paul Rudd just being our universal boyfriend, and a not-very-famous Bradley Cooper, whom I knew from Alias and was super excited about. Who knew that in a few short years he would be the biggest star of the bunch! Anyway, it was a kind of boring show, and that’s all I remember, which is a shame because I am currently on a train with two days and two nights left to go, and I would like to be thinking about a play instead. How is it going so far, you ask? Let’s just say if I didn’t want to talk so much about Broadway whenever I had the chance, this post would have simply been called Three Days of Pain.
Dear little baby laptop diary,
I titled this post after one of the most random Broadway plays I’ve ever seen, “Three Days of Rain”, with Julia Roberts making her lackluster debut, Paul Rudd just being our universal boyfriend, and a not-very-famous Bradley Cooper, whom I knew from Alias and was super excited about. Who knew that in a few short years he would be the biggest star of the bunch! Anyway, it was a kind of boring show, and that’s all I remember, which is a shame because I am currently on a train with two days and two nights left to go, and I would like to be thinking about a play instead. How is it going so far, you ask? Let’s just say if I didn’t want to talk so much about Broadway whenever I had the chance, this post would have simply been called Three Days of Pain.
After our 24 hour stay in Yekaterinburg – our lovely, fancy-hotel-staying-to-reward-ourselves-after-the-24-hour-train-and-to-treat-ourselves-before-the-3-day-train stay- we boarded The Train. This would be our longest train journey yet, longer than the baby-sized sleepers we’d done so far, longer than when we took Amtrak from Chicago to San Francisco and thought we were so brave. I want to slap old me across the face. Amtrak was luxury. We had a tinier cabin but it was just the two of us, and man alive if I ever slam Amtrak bathrooms again, remind me of where we are now. I would kill for an Amtrak bathroom on this train. We boarded 10pm Thursday, as I write it is 2pm Friday, and we get off this Snowpiercer on SUNDAY at noon. SUNDAY. From boarding THURSDAY! Guysss I don’t know if I’m going to make it. Well if anyone is actually reading this it means I made it, because there’s no wifi so I have to post this after we disembark on that magical day (and actually, after I post all the other posts that come chronologically before this because that’s how I want to do it), BUT STILL, who knows how changed I will be. Who knows if I will still have the same likes, the same dreams and passions, the same hair or if I tore it all out in a ravenous fit of cabin fever unchecked by all the Ativan Caki gave me (thank you Caki)? Will I even be human? Are we human or are we dancers? It’s already starting, see.
Oh dear sweet little baby 8 pound 6 ounce newborn infant laptop, don’t even know a word yet…
We boarded last night and found an empty cabin, which was nice so we could put all our stuff away without bothering people already there (this train started all the way back in Moscow). A very clean surprisingly non-smelly older gentleman (our first non-smelly gentleman in the whole country!) joined us, and he was fine. It was a lucky roommate to have! He was a history professor who was very nice and we chatted for like a minute before we all went to sleep. Perfect! Unfortunately, it was short-lived. The train made approximately 25 stops during the night, during which I started thinking about how excited my brother is for the new “Murder on the Orient Express” movie (me too what a cast hooray for Baby Leslie Odom (I decided to call everyone who is a ‘Jr.’ just ‘Baby’ instead, shout out to Baby Robert Downey)) but then of course I started THINKING about Murder on the Orient Express and how I’m as close right now to that situation as I’ll ever be and these strangers are always in our cabins and everyone smells bad and has knives because we all came prepared with days of food and the appropriate cutlery and I was like don’t let anyone stab anyone tonight Dame Judy! So then I couldn’t sleep for a while. I finally started to maybe get closer to sleep, despite the rocking motion of this train being worse than the downtown trains of the NYC subway the ones you cannot possibly try to surf hands-free during else you’ll fly into the opposite end of the carriage, and much worse than the tube with all its own dragon noises and bumping and creaking and omg. But then, at 4am, our friendly cabinmate got off at his stop. Lucky guy was only on a train for 6 hours! That’s nothing! Then, unfortunately, it started. The kind of cabinmates I had feared started coming in our room. Our first new cabinmate was a smelly Russian man about our age who immediately took his shirt off and let the smell fester even more. I was on a bottom bunk, Husband was on the top, and Shirtless Youth was on the other top. Then a few hours later after another frighteningly jerky stop, our next cabinmate arrived. He is maybe in his 40s, maybe 50, and he is a giant flesh person. He is just a giant sack of human. This is a tiny f-ing cabin and either his endless flesh or his even worse stench is EVERYWHERE. We can’t put our legs down to sit on my bunk because his are there. We can’t breathe without breathing in his b.o. He is scratching right now while humming. He scratches his uncovered skin (he’s wearing shorts and like a belly shirt) and flicks whatever comes up all while humming, Guys. I’m trying to be strong and brave and grateful. I am grateful that he doesn’t smell like smoke. That’s literally all I got.
I thought the unwritten but definite rule of these cabins was that whoever is on the top gets to sit on the bottom bunk on their side during the day and use the little table for their meals. Each side keeps to themselves. I begrudgingly learned this on our first long train when Husband and I both had bottoms so the woman on top of mine sat on my bed a lot. I learned, great, that’s how it’s done, she can’t prepare her food and eat up top. OK, I got it, sorry I gave you a bad look. But this morning, after I exercised outside our door in the hallway (there’s a bar running down the hallway of our cabin, it’s tight but it’s enough space to do barre exercises like I’m a GODDAMN BALLERINA and lots and lots of squat variations and calf raises. No one was up when I was out there so I also got out my resistance bands and worked my back so darn happy about that I think I’d go insane if I was cooped up here and couldn’t at least try to work a muscle), I came back to sit on my bed and read and Shirtless Youth was sitting on my pillow by the table making his breakfast. Like. NO. You get the bottom bunk and table part from the guy BELOW YOU. That’s the rule!! Omg! I guess he literally couldn’t because the Giant Flesh Ball Man was oozing out everywhere you turned and they couldn’t both sit on that bunk, but still, that’s not my problem man! I waited outside and did more calf raises and then when he got up I claimed my spot back and haven’t left since. Except to pee in the literal pits of despair. These toilets are so grimy and sludgy and I’m spending so much time in there because I pee a lot and Husband and I brought 15 liters of water on this trip with us and I have to drink it even though I fear it’s not enough for three days. That’s for two people! (We each carried a 5L jug and had three 1.5L bottles between us and I also had about 1/2 liter left in another bottle. Hey I guess that is 16L maybe we will make it.)
OH MY GOD Giant Flesh Ball just went to the bathroom and came back shirtless and is now putting deodorant on while sitting next to me I am going to vomit. OH my god Shirtless Youth is also still shirtless and just got down from his top bunk by jumping onto my bed with his smelly feet right on my sheets, right next to my physical body. He was just ‘cleaning’ his grundle with his towel I cannot believe this. GFB Man is still humming and now is drumming his fingers in rhythm the whole time on the table omg I am going to LOSE MY MIND.
Oh wait. Oh my god they both seem to be getting dressed! And not in their smelly sleep clothes, in real clothes with buttons and things! Ahh praise Jesus are they disembarking? Did we reach their stop? Or did we reach my melting point? We don’t stop for like 30 minutes I cannot wait to see how this goes! I’m so nervous and excited and scared that I’m getting my hopes up! Are they going?? Will our new neighbors be even worse? Even smellier? Even more in my personal space? Why do men think they have the right to my personal space? I guess we will see what happens in 30 minutes when we stop at some combination of letters I already forgot. I have to go pee before they lock the bathrooms at the stop (they get locked at every stop because, well, because everything ‘flushes’ onto the track, so at least it’s a civilized reason). We will see what happens.
Oh my god she already locked the bathroom! We don’t arrive at the stop for another 30 minutes this is INHUMAN. GFB Man is brushing his crumbs from his side of the table towards me and the computer. That’s just swell of you. He’s still humming. Shirtless Maybe-Not-So-Young Man is now shirtless again, despite having dressed himself five minutes ago, so I have less hope of his departure now. He’s also sitting on his top bunk with his feet hanging off pretty much in my face (it’s tiny room) and they smell so bad my eyes are tearing. I’m also equally frightened that if they do get off, our newbies will be even worse. What if THEY reek of smoke? Ughhh that would be worse. And we have TWO FULL DAYS LEFT. Two more sleepless nights. Two more days of having to time my bathroom breaks between frequent stops. Two more days of constant Purell because there’s no soap in the bathrooms. Two more days of using precious bottled water to brush my teeth and wash my face because the train water would give me cholera. Two more days without contacts because no way I’m touching my eyes. Actually that last one is good, my eyes need a break from contacts.
While I wait on my ability to pee and breathe from the smelly guys maybe leaving and cry from possibly worse new cabinmates, I will tell of all the food we had to buy and bring onboard for 3 days. No meals are included in our ticket and the dining car is very expensive, but also I think they have zero options for me anyway. Husband will check it out later or tomorrow I’m sure (we can’t both leave, someone has to guard our stuff). So in Yekaterinburg, we found a few giant supermarkets that were very expensive (they had no cheap supermarket, so weird! No little bodegas like have been all over the rest of Russia either). We found lots of good treats and bought a lot, but considering it’s three days worth of food for two people it’s probably just right. We bought jars of white beans in tomato sauce with some veg in there, which I’m sooo pumped about. Like mamma ‘taliano looking stuff, I hope. We also found vegetarian grape leaves in a can, another tomato sauced bean thing in a can, and lots of bread. And we brought that fantastic Russian staple, instant kasha! Sooo good. I used to think kasha was just a part of that disgusting Main Line Jewish dish of kash’ n’ bowties but aside from that it’s actually really good. And good for you! Along with cucumbers, tomatoes, and pickles (probably not the best idea because they smell, but if people don’t care how their bodies smell why should I care how my food smells), and more apples and orange, we are set. Plus we found a lot of chocolate in Yekaterinburg so happy dance. And cookies! Every city we’ve been in so far, I’ve scoured ingredient labels and found one package of accidentally vegan cookies. Never the same one, so we’re on our third try. The chocolate chip ones in St. Pete’s were still the best, but the cinnamon ones in Moscow were very yummy too. I will report back on these weird blueberry puffballs I found! I hope that when we eat all this stuff I don’t have a Meg Ryan in “French Kiss” train moment (LACTOSE INTOLERAAAAANCE who knows it? best movie ever I pretend Kevin Kline won his Tony a few weeks ago as a belated gift for “French Kiss”).
quick cooking kasha! |
this chocolate bar is ALL OVER the country !! accidentally vegan wooohooo |
these amazing Trader Joe’s finds are gonna get me through! Brought two bags! |
found these amazing dehydrated veggie crackers at Veggie Bro in Vladimir (go back and read about it if you missed it last week!) |
There are good things. I got to have an instant Quaker oatmeal packet for breakfast today, which is (I’m sorry) one of my favorite foods and one of the easiest things to make because of the samovar in our carriage (every carriage has a samovar of endless (god I hope!) hot water, so anything instant is good). We also use the boiled water to clean our dishes and stuff. I read “Between the World in Me” already, which was wonderful, “The Days of Abandonment”, which I actively despised (sorry Kip), and David Sedaris’s new diary-entry book, which is better in short bursts than all at once. I also reread dear sweet Nora’s “I Feel Bad About My Neck” because it’s the best. I have a lot of podcasts on my phone, and I could listen to at least half of one Gilmore Guys (or five regular length podcasts) before my battery dies. Also, there are really nice Dutch women with two little kids down the car who we are talking to a bit. They smell fine. It’s a treat.
Well, back to reality. The two smelly guys did indeed get off. But we immediately got two new Russian men who…I’m not yet sure, but I think they might be worse. They’re meaner, that’s for sure. When they came by, I said hello (in Russian) and smiled and they didn’t even blink or glance at me just threw their stuff on their bunks and went back out. WTF. A few minutes later, Husband did the same thing when they returned and again, no eye contact, no utterance of any kind in our direction. Stupid Russian jerks! Fine don’t talk to us, that’s good for me. But they smell a little smoky, which better not get worse. I’m promising myself two things: If they ‘magically’ get smokier (meaning they’ve smoked on the train, which is not allowed), I am going to say something (I am able to say ‘you smoked? where? not allowed!”); and if they sit on my bed at any point I am putting my foot down and getting super scary and yelling “NYET! that is your side, and this is our side.” I think I know how I say that. They know each other so that makes it easier. I hope it doesn’t come to my having to yell in very poor Russian at men I have to sleep next to for at least one night. Their phone noises are on, too, which is a big no-no, and just as the icing on the cake, their phone noises are incredibly loud bits of very bad songs.
Dear little baby laptop, lying there in your ghost manger, just watching your Baby Einstein developmental videos, learning about shapes and colors…
Guys! The men all left super quickly and we had the cabin to ourselves for dinnertime on the second night! Then an army man joined us and was so well behaved and organized (and made his bed immaculately in 8 seconds flat, we were very embarrassed about how ours looked after that). He smells fine! The Dutch family down the hall has become our friends, and they are vegetarian so we are going to all meet in Mongolia (where we all end up for Naadam) at Loving Hut! And there’s a Danish girl (not to be confused with The Danish Girl) about our age who is now also our friend and we will probably see in Mongolia! Things are looking up in Duloc! Oh man it all really depends on your cabinmates, I guess. Well but the constant bathroom locking is terrible, especially for me, so that is really rough. But with decent, nonsmelly roommates this whole train thing might actually be…fun? Okay obviously I need a nap since I’m clearly losing it.
