Show Boat on the West End: Top-Notch Production of a Classic Showby Randi / August 16, 2016
*This post is part of a series in which I eat fancy Michelin-starred meals and then brag about it.
Recently, Husband and I celebrated our second wedding anniversary! Although the traditional gift is cotton, we decided we’d be okay with food instead. (We decided this last year too, and next year.) We quickly came up with The Clove Club after I was informed that eating tubs of soft serve from Yorica! probably isn’t a smart idea. Located in Shoreditch’s Town Hall, The Clove Club is only a few years old and a favorite of super hip people. To make sure people know how super hip it is and how special you have to be to get in, you don’t make a reservation per se; you buy tickets online to the ‘event’ of your dinner, well in advance. So we had tickets to the show a few weeks ago, on a Tuesday evening at 7ish, and it went past 11pm because it was a tasting menu at a Michelin-rated restaurant (one star) and that’s what they do that’s what they do.
The Clove Club shares sample tasting menus on their website, and lists a vegetarian option, which is a great start considering none of these restaurants (except Alinea) ever use the v-word without prompting. The sample vegetarian menu is heavy on dairy and eggs, but they assured us that they could easily make a vegan menu of equal quality. WE’LL SEE. (No they did, it was great.) I have no f-ing clue how many courses this is going to be, because we ordered the extended menu (which you can see; I love the restaurants that give you your personal menu like you’re a goddamn king) but like all such places, they send out a number of ‘snacks’ first that they don’t include on the menu and I forget what anything is the second I’m done eating it. Oh well.
When we arrived, various people led us to our little table in the little dining room, which was decorated simply. I didn’t notice any famies but then again I don’t know British celebrities at all. All the good ones go to American anyway amiright!! Our waitress was fantastic, and immediately confirmed that I was une vegan. I wish I remembered her name but all I remember is that she was from Sicily. She was seriously the best wait person I have encountered ever in this country. Give her a raise, Clove Club.
Sicilia (I’m just gonna call her that) immediately asked if we wanted still or sparkling water, so, plus 1 on the water issue getting handled quickly! To that question, I usually respond ‘tap’ because they are always trying to trick you into buying a bottle when they ask that question. Angry face! No one should have to pay for water! Luckily, Husband answered before I had the chance to embarrass us with my answer, because fancy clean water was included in our already-paid bill. Phew! They probably would have asked me to leave. Husband likes sparkling water and I like still, so they brought us bottles of both and kept refilling them at a very impressive pace. Bravo! Finally! Sicilia also confirmed that Husband was doing a wine pairing while I was getting a soft pairing! I had completely forgotten about that! This is the first time I’ve ever heard a restaurant offering beverage pairings with each dish for anything other than alcohol, so this was so exciting. Then she brought us cold towels like you might get on planes if you are a fancy person. I liked that they were chilled because it is summer (sort of), but I wonder if they give warm towels in the winter. That sounds like it would be nice.
Sicilia (I’m just gonna call her that) immediately asked if we wanted still or sparkling water, so, plus 1 on the water issue getting handled quickly! To that question, I usually respond ‘tap’ because they are always trying to trick you into buying a bottle when they ask that question. Angry face! No one should have to pay for water! Luckily, Husband answered before I had the chance to embarrass us with my answer, because fancy clean water was included in our already-paid bill. Phew! They probably would have asked me to leave. Husband likes sparkling water and I like still, so they brought us bottles of both and kept refilling them at a very impressive pace. Bravo! Finally! Sicilia also confirmed that Husband was doing a wine pairing while I was getting a soft pairing! I had completely forgotten about that! This is the first time I’ve ever heard a restaurant offering beverage pairings with each dish for anything other than alcohol, so this was so exciting. Then she brought us cold towels like you might get on planes if you are a fancy person. I liked that they were chilled because it is summer (sort of), but I wonder if they give warm towels in the winter. That sounds like it would be nice.
DON’T EAT THE YELLOW SNOW. or do
Okay so the food! We started quickly with a few tiny dishes, or snacks as they’re called, though I know from “Friends” that they should be called amuse bouches. Thanks television! First off was this freeze-dried yellow tomato ice crumble. I might be completely wrong. But this yellow stuff was definitely vegetable ice, and it was pretty goodl! It melted away sort of like a cross between sorbet and snow. Yeah it was very much like snow. It was really cool and refreshing.
ohneeon skin |
I’ll call you jicama |
The next bouche was a piece of fried onion skin, which sounds mean but it was decent. It tasted like a sophisticated onion ring without the stench of other Outback customers infiltrating it. I liked that it was something different and fun, although yeah it was a piece of ohneeon skin that they just chose not to throw away. Next was like a little sushi piece or wrap, with a thin crunchy vegetable ribbon rolled up with greens and a pate. I forget what the vegetable was; I want to say jicama because it looks like it but it wasn’t that. Whatever, it was a nice little veggie roll-up.
Fun with cookie cutters!
The last of our little snacks was hot! This star-shaped veggie patty was deeeelicious! I could have eaten 100 of ’em! It had a very thin outer layer and was soft inside, like a fried jawn you’d keep in the freezer for children. As a childlike person, I really enjoyed it. And it was a fun shape!
We were brought a basket of bread by this point, with olive oil for me. Like other Michelin restaurants who give you bread, the olive oil was the best I’ve had in a long time, probably since the last such place. The bread was good but it was cold. Well not cold but room temperature, I guess. If it was slightly warm it would have been off the chiz.
We were brought a basket of bread by this point, with olive oil for me. Like other Michelin restaurants who give you bread, the olive oil was the best I’ve had in a long time, probably since the last such place. The bread was good but it was cold. Well not cold but room temperature, I guess. If it was slightly warm it would have been off the chiz.
We’re on to the main event(s)! First up for me was a salt baked white beetroot, that they had grown in their special garden and sliced into thin ribbons. I’m loving all these ribbons, guys! I didn’t know you could make white beetroot; I thought the main identifying aspects of beets were that they were red and tasted like dirt. These were excellent though, and salt baking sounds like a great way to cook them. The white ribbons were mixed with hazelnuts and burnet, which I learned is a salad herb, and dressed up with little edible flowers. It was a truly beautiful dish, and a nice start to the main meal. My soft pairing here was so perfect for me it was like they researched me in advance – green juice! I forget the exact components but I think it had cucumber, parsley, and lemon.
Next was a salad of bobby beans, which I never heard of before, but apparently they’re just green beans, which I don’t count as beans, actually; I count them as vegetables. Regardless, this was the only sign of bean/protein in the entire meal, which is expected at nonvegan restaurants like this but disappointing. Definitely something these restaurants have in common and all need to work on. Anyway though, this was a very good little salad, with the green beans mixed with incredibly fresh and delicious peach, almond pieces, and something called manjimup truffle. The only manjimup I found while googling is a place is Australia, so I guess it’s a fancy way of saying imported truffle? I f-ing love truffles. Pour truffle oil on all of my food. I like it less so when it’s just sliced raw pieces because their immense flavor doesn’t fully come out that way, but even so I feel like Cathy Z. Jones when I am served it, so yeah still good. Ooh my soft pairing here was a cold Earl Grey tea with lavender, I think. Really good!
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Next was the standard you would expect when any and every nonveg place caters to a vegan – baked aubergine, or eggplant for you ‘mercans. Unlike the endless conference/wedding meals of crappy baked eggplant topped with bland tomato sauce, this version was wonderful. The tiny eggplants were cooked well and covered with herbs and a thin, tasty green tomato sauce. RG! My soft here I thiiiink was the apple juice, slightly greenified. Yum!
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As a little interlude in the meal, we were served a summer herb broth that was a million times more incredible than it should have been. This liquid was denser, flavor-wise, than anything I can remember ever eating, and each sip was like an enormous garden boiled down to a teaspoon. It really was great. I’m like the vegan version right now of what I imagine people who rave over bone broth are, except not a damn idiot.
CORN HAIR
The first course in Act II I think is my favorite, just because while being delicious it was also fun and kind of hilarious. The Scottish girolles, Michelin restaurants’ favorite mushroom, were grilled wonderfully and served with kale and sweetcorn. Then it was all topped with CORN HAIR! I find this so darn funny! I ate the corn hair, naturally, and it was pretty good so I do think I was supposed to eat it. Every component of this dish was great: kale is always welcome on my plate; the sweet corn tasted like perfect creamed corn down south; and the girolles were lovely. Yay fun great dish! Oh, you can sort of see in the background a little cup of red? That was my soft pairing, and while I couldn’t finish it, it was the most perfect pairing – red pepper and gochujang juice! Unlike my experience at the Just V Fest, this wasn’t just pure (chili) pepper; it was tempered with other fruits and vegetables, but it was pretty powerful and really just awesome, especially with the gochujang. I can’t do a lot of red pepper though before I start feeling sick, so the last sips went to Husband, who really enjoyed it. I just love this pairing idea because red pepper goes so well with corn! And corn hair!
One of the few times our courses resembled each other’s happened next, with the consomme. Mine was mushroom, and between this and the summer herb broth, I’m pretty sure The Clove Club has the best broths in the entire world. Such good liquids! And you know I love liquid! What put it over the top, though, was how it was served. The alcohol guy came over, not the waiters, with our soups and a bottle of 100-year-old Madeira. A small amount of the Madeira was poured into a big glass, and then swished around so it coated the glass, and then we were instructed to drink the bit that was left before the consomme was poured in. That way, we had the Madeira taste in our mouths and it was coating the glass, so it augmented the flavors of the consomme, which was amazing, deep and mushroomy. I don’t like alcohol but this was a really cool way to jazz up consomme while also making the diner feel super g-d special! I mean hell it was A HUNDRED YEARS OLD and the little amount they gave me probably cost like $200 or something crazy. Fire that son of a bitch up and throw it at my head!
Groatsy boatsy oatsy floatsy
My last savory course was this great pile of oat groat risotto with courgette (zucchini) and sunflower seeds. I knowwww you’re thinking, omg another dish of hot wet rice (risotto) at a fancy pants restaurant? I know because I thought it too, and always do when I’m presented with hot wet rice, the vegan standard dish all over the world. Le sigh. But this was great! The oat groats made for a nice creative change and helped to earthify the zucchini from being too light and sweet. The courgette flowers fried on top were a nice touch. The only problem was that half the zucchini was cut into thick slabs, which is gross, and thus undercooked. And that one with the little stalk-end still on it should have been cut off. That piece was really undercooked too, which was upsetting. But aside from the too-thick zucchini pieces (just ribbon it, always! otherwise it’s just plain warm zucchini which is usually not tasty), this was a nice dish and I really liked the main groat part.
Next came dessert! Unfortunately, dessert did not meet the higher standards set by the dinner part. What are the two things I always complain about being served for dessert as a vegan? Fruit sorbet, and fruit. And those were the two dessert courses here, sadly. They were still really good and impressive for what they are, but I just can’t help being the tiniest bit disappointed that, in essence, these two very basic things are the best this outstanding restaurant (and virtually all others) can come up with. You should be able to think of something more creative! I understand that the fact that they accommodated me at all is something, and that they can’t think of so many spectacular alternatives when they’re focusing on the main menu offerings, but still I have hope.
Little sorbet treat
At least the sorbet wasn’t lemon or something. It was apricot, and it really was delectable, for sorbet. Served with toasted almonds, a few mint leaves, and more edible flowers, it was beautiful looking and tasting. It was creamier than most sorbets are, so that is good. Okay, this one gets a pass! It really was good.
The second dessert was a lemongrass and berry jelly, which was fine but not worthy of ending the meal. A little too boring, a little too it’s-just-berries-and-jelly. Of course by this point I was seriously full anyway, so whatever.
The second dessert was a lemongrass and berry jelly, which was fine but not worthy of ending the meal. A little too boring, a little too it’s-just-berries-and-jelly. Of course by this point I was seriously full anyway, so whatever.
My last soft pairing was disappointing too. It was an elderflower juice, which normally I love, but it was just too f-ing sweet, cloying really. The rest of the soft pairings were absolutely killer so an off one had to happen, I guess. It’s just too bad it happened at the end. The berries were good, I’ll give them that! However, that little tart thing was for Husband, and I was told that because I don’t get one of those, I was given an extra strawberry piece. UM. That’s pretty lame. Like…that takes balls to offer as a substitute.
Aside from the final course and a few complaints here and there, this dinner really was impressive. All the savory dishes and snacks were delicious and interesting, as was the sorbet, though I hate to admit it. What really saved it after the disappointing finale was that they brought two house-made chocolate bars over for us to take home – and one was actually vegan! Similar places never have vegan chocolate! Huzzah! Totally saved. It was dark chocolate with coffee and biscuits, and I don’t like coffee but couldn’t taste it at all. I think it just enhanced the chocolate flavor. So nice!
Our lovely waitress brought over this little token at the end too, how cute!! She really was the best!
THE CLOVE CLUB, SHOREDITCH, LONDON, UK, EUROPE FOR NOW
Water speed: Amazing!! Great job! And it wasn’t tap but it was included dance dance dance! (I’m very cheap.)
Service: Absolutely wonderful. The best waitress in London by far!
Bathrooms: The bathrooms are downstairs, dark and reminiscent of like a brothel in 1800’s New Orleans. You know what I mean? The lighting was dim, the colors were dark reds and browns, and random cosmetics were scattered on display. A very strange mood going on but it was nice and clean, so whatever! Also I liked that the stall was separated from the sink area, despite being a single serve bathroom. People don’t have to wait outside that way, avoiding the awkwardness that comes from that. Oh the toilet seat was hysterically big and weird! That’s enough.
Food: A wonderful meal overall, with only very few missteps. As with all similar fancy but nonveg restaurants, they really could do to up the protein quotient of the vegan menu. They focus on doing vegetables and doing them very well, and I’m not saying add tofu or seitan or something when they don’t use it for the main diners, but add a bean here or there, ya know? And dessert, at least the final one, really could use some work. Other than that, it was splendid.
Bonus: The restaurant has a great atmosphere and makes you feel so special being there! Be cool like hip Shoreditch people! It was the perfect place to celebrate a special occasion. Oh and the biggest bonus – SOFT PAIRING!!!!
Water speed: Amazing!! Great job! And it wasn’t tap but it was included dance dance dance! (I’m very cheap.)
Service: Absolutely wonderful. The best waitress in London by far!
Bathrooms: The bathrooms are downstairs, dark and reminiscent of like a brothel in 1800’s New Orleans. You know what I mean? The lighting was dim, the colors were dark reds and browns, and random cosmetics were scattered on display. A very strange mood going on but it was nice and clean, so whatever! Also I liked that the stall was separated from the sink area, despite being a single serve bathroom. People don’t have to wait outside that way, avoiding the awkwardness that comes from that. Oh the toilet seat was hysterically big and weird! That’s enough.
Food: A wonderful meal overall, with only very few missteps. As with all similar fancy but nonveg restaurants, they really could do to up the protein quotient of the vegan menu. They focus on doing vegetables and doing them very well, and I’m not saying add tofu or seitan or something when they don’t use it for the main diners, but add a bean here or there, ya know? And dessert, at least the final one, really could use some work. Other than that, it was splendid.
Bonus: The restaurant has a great atmosphere and makes you feel so special being there! Be cool like hip Shoreditch people! It was the perfect place to celebrate a special occasion. Oh and the biggest bonus – SOFT PAIRING!!!!
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Vegan Guide to Michelin Restaurants: Ramon Freixa in Madrid, Spain
*This post is part of a series in which I eat fancy Michelin-starred meals and then brag about it.
When we spent a weekend in Madrid this year, Husband surprised me with a reservation for lunch at Ramon Freixa, a restaurant with two (2!) Michelin stars. This was obviously very exciting, although the place is not well-known for its vegan-friendliness. Husband contacted all the best restaurants in Madrid to see who could accommodate vegans the most, and Ramon’s assurances were the most persuasive and promising. And if they didn’t do a good job, at least I could publicly shame them on my blog. Happily, we are doing zero shaming today! (At least on the blog.) Ramon Freixa presented me with a delightful, seemingly endless vegan ‘lunch’ (it lasted well into the evening).
Before we get to the food, let’s talk about the restaurant itself. We were brought to a heated covered patio sort of thing, like a sun room, to wait for our table. We had one of the first reservations of the day and we were a little early so we sat in the lovely little sun room that would have been so much lovelier if it wasn’t January. a few businessmen-type people were doing business at a nearby table. Soon we were led inside, and the restaurant was so clean and shiny and pretty and I realized, erma p, I am quite underdressed. Although I haven’t written in it in a really long time, I do indeed have a Style section on this website. I like to think that I have at least decent taste (and those of you remembering my law school backpack can shove it). So, I am embarrassed to say that the one and only time I believe I was ever, ever underdressed was for this lunch!! Que c’est embarrassant!
The sunroom? bar? |
Our table so pretty! And big! So big! |
My bag has its own little seat!
My favorite thing right off the bat was that, before I could put my (favorite Matt & Nat!) purse on the floor, a staff member literally swept in and placed a metal stool next to my chair for that purpose. I mean. Come on. A seat for my bag? Where am I? This is awesome! I knew then that my napkin would be folded into a swan or elephant every time I went to the bathroom, and that I did not have to worry about my water refills. It’s that kind of place.
Unfortunately for you, the printed menu they gave us is poorly translated and poorly edited of the non-vegan items. I’ll do the best I can to describe things and remember what the crap they were, but I’ll tell you right now, I don’t remember any details. Spoiler: I’m also sharing two pictures of non-vegan foods (the butter dish and a small cheese) because they were the most adorable and awesome-looking things ever, and you can’t really tell what they are anyway.
The first few dishes were already on our table when we were seated, which I very much enjoyed. According to the menu, we have seaweed crackers, “cold and hot citric”, and “the strawberry that wanted to become tomato”, the latter of which is the name of a book or movie or song I’m going to write; I don’t care what it is I need to use that name. The crackers were self-explanatory, nothing special. But the other two components set the bar extremely high for the rest of the meal, at least creativity-wise. The cold and hot citric was a really citrus sorbet but with hot citrus juice poured on top, so it was frozen yet hot and foaming while you ate it. It was delicious, but more than that, it was awesome. Our poor little strawberry friend was a huge surprise, because it looked like a strawberry, little seed dots and all, but it was indeed a tomato. A perfect raw tomato that had somehow been manipulated to look like a strawberry AND to not taste like the usual (gross) raw tomatoes. So cool!
The first few dishes were already on our table when we were seated, which I very much enjoyed. According to the menu, we have seaweed crackers, “cold and hot citric”, and “the strawberry that wanted to become tomato”, the latter of which is the name of a book or movie or song I’m going to write; I don’t care what it is I need to use that name. The crackers were self-explanatory, nothing special. But the other two components set the bar extremely high for the rest of the meal, at least creativity-wise. The cold and hot citric was a really citrus sorbet but with hot citrus juice poured on top, so it was frozen yet hot and foaming while you ate it. It was delicious, but more than that, it was awesome. Our poor little strawberry friend was a huge surprise, because it looked like a strawberry, little seed dots and all, but it was indeed a tomato. A perfect raw tomato that had somehow been manipulated to look like a strawberry AND to not taste like the usual (gross) raw tomatoes. So cool!
Hot and cold citric |
Strawberries but really tomatoes! |
Next, we were brought small bread rolls that we got to choose from an enormous and varied basket (yay and I wanted all of them). I was given a little dish of some of the greatest olive oil ever, while Husband was given a hockey puck and a rock. I kid you not. A hockey puck and a rock. He called over a waiter and asked, “Um…so…what do I do with these objects?” Judging from past experience, we assumed the rock was very very hot and that it was a cooking stone for an ingredient to be presented (this is actually based on past experience, not joking). But the waiter showed us that the hockey puck was actually a butter dish (the butter was the middle) and the rock was a soft piece of cheese that happened to have a slate grey shell formed around it. I mean, I was cracking up. My favorite things that I never ate and don’t want anyone to eat!
THANKS, BREAD! |
I’m sorry it’s a non-veg item but come on this is hilarious it was a rock |
Tell me this isn’t a hockey puck! |
Tomatoes on a cracker but amazing
After being served basket bread, it turned out that our next real dish was more bread! Yay! Well, it was a crispbread, luckily, because we got basket bread multiple times. (Michelin restaurants in Spain give bread! Who knew!) The cracker was doused in amazing olive oil and salt, and topped with delicious tomatoes and tomato pulp. I don’t usually get excited about raw tomatoes, but this was so so great. Like the cracker version of the best bruschetta ever.
The next two small plates are mysteries. They were both good, one incredible and one fine, but I’m just not sure what they were. I think the fantastic one was a lentil cracker with some kind of cheesy root vegetable and crispy things on top. It was such a lovely little bite I could have had 100 of them. It was also served upon a white ceramic tree stump. Hot damn I love the stuff fancy restaurants use. The fine one I think was chia seeds; the menu says ‘veggy roe’ which is pretty accurate for chia pudding actually. It had chopped carrot or winter squash in there and some seaweed.
The next two small plates are mysteries. They were both good, one incredible and one fine, but I’m just not sure what they were. I think the fantastic one was a lentil cracker with some kind of cheesy root vegetable and crispy things on top. It was such a lovely little bite I could have had 100 of them. It was also served upon a white ceramic tree stump. Hot damn I love the stuff fancy restaurants use. The fine one I think was chia seeds; the menu says ‘veggy roe’ which is pretty accurate for chia pudding actually. It had chopped carrot or winter squash in there and some seaweed.
Uncle cracker |
Chia pudding? |
The following dish was actually a dish (huge news!), on a dish, and was a little miracle. Not kidding, this plate I think was my favorite, one of the best parts of the meal. It included ‘steamed truffle made of truffle’ and ‘vanilla souffle potatoes’. Let’s start with the truffle made of truffle. It was perfect black truffle whipped into a truffle shape. I have never had real truffles before, aside from an odd dash of lower-quality truffle oil at some places, so it was pretty awesome to have my first legit truffle be an enormous glob of the good stuff. And I mean enormous. It was probably too much for the dish, and I’m sure other people would have had trouble finishing the insanely rich delicacy, but I loved it. Erma. I’m such a convert to truffles now. Not that I have ever bought anything truffle or had any since.
Bests
So so cool
That’s a lot of super rich truffle! It was so so good. Anyone who thinks truffles are so over are crazy. And they sound pretentious. Now I’m cracking up hearing Louis CK do his pretentious white girl voice saying “truffles are soo ooover.” Anyway, that wasn’t even the best part of this plate. That lone slice of potato that looks kind of sad, the one wearing the hat? was the most incredible, creative, and surprisingly delicious part of this whole meal. When they told us it was a vanilla potato, we were like…umm…that’s going to be gross. A for creativity and trying to be unique, but what? No, we were very wrong. It was spectacular! Purely vanilla, but still proper to be eating with savory food. So incredible! Here’s a close-up so you can see the vanilla bean goodness.
After such rich food, I was grateful that the next dish was lighter and healthier, although it did taste healthier to if you know what I mean. This was a bean log, made of pureed white beans, rolled in broccoli dust, with shaved raw truffles at the ends. (Raw truffles do not taste like whipped awesome truffles.) This did taste a little like plain beans and raw broccoli, but I am vegan so I really enjoyed it.
After such rich food, I was grateful that the next dish was lighter and healthier, although it did taste healthier to if you know what I mean. This was a bean log, made of pureed white beans, rolled in broccoli dust, with shaved raw truffles at the ends. (Raw truffles do not taste like whipped awesome truffles.) This did taste a little like plain beans and raw broccoli, but I am vegan so I really enjoyed it.
Ah but next up was another rich dish! Well, a rich and crazy soup, really, or tea…or coffee. On the menu, it is called ‘from tea to cappuccino’, and it was another mind-boggling creation. A cup of hot mushroom broth was topped with a thick salted celery foam that I’m pretty sure is responsible for one of the Michelin stars. Celery foam! After you got through the ‘cappuccino’ foam, you got to the mushroom ‘tea’. Incredible little cup of wonder!
Grilled veggies, I just can’t finish you!
As expected with a restaurant that isn’t primarily vegan-focused, one of my ‘main’ dishes was grilled vegetables. But, it was pretty wonderful! There was a small cauliflower steak, perfectly oily mushrooms, asparagus tips, pearl onions, Brussels sprouts, tiny whole carrots, and a wonderful rich sauce underneath it all. This dish was described in the menu as being ‘like an animated forest’. I don’t know if that’s true, but it’s awesome.
By now you probably realize, whew, this is a lot of food, we must be getting near dessert, right? And you said this was lunch?! Nope, two more savory courses to go! Luckily, even though I was quite (QUITE) full, the next two plates were some of my favorite things ever. First off, we got tofu! It was sooo goood. And so surprising! They must work with tofu regularly because otherwise I just don’t know how they made this so well. It tasted like it was marinated in soy sauce, and it was really firm and incredibly smooth (not grainy), which I rarely find in tofu regardless of the source. The tofu sat on a bed of fresh peas, and it was all seasoned so lightly but so well. So cool!
Really good tofu!
We ended the savory food section on a high note, with a tiny hot soup of fresh peas and..a grain? topped with grilled radicchio. This was so perfect, I wish I could recreate it to have for dinner on a cold winter’s night. Or a cold summer night; I am in London still wearing longs and longs in July.
After such an impressive array of food, it was only natural that the desserts wouldn’t be able to reach the same high levels. They did a remarkable job with the food, for a restaurant that doesn’t usually serve vegans, but dessert is harder for most places. I got two beautiful if simple fruit dishes, one that came with a poof of Smurf hair cotton candy. Pretty fun!
Another tree stump ! |
Vegan Smurf |
All in all, it was a splendid meal, and definitely recommended if you are looking for a duper fancy restaurant in Madrid. I think I’m still full from it.
RAMON FREIXA, MADRID, SPAIN
Water speed: Total bosses! I think there was a waiter who was solely responsible for watering me.
Service: See above. Pretty great.
Bathrooms: Omg the bathrooms were so funny. The restaurant decor was all golds and whites and silvers, very simple chic, and then the bathroom was like neon yellow and futuristic plastic stuff, so funny. There were incredibly fancy soaps and lotions too; I considered pulling a ‘Broad City’ and filling up a plastic bag with them.
Food: Really wonderful overall. Some dishes were basic but the average was brought up pretty high due to some standouts.
Bonus: Pretty sure we were dining with the richest Japanese businessmen planning coups and stuff. Also people were wearing hilarious dinner jackets. Like hilarious.
Chappy Chanukah! Let’s Fry Up Some Birds’ Nest Latkes!
Happy Hanukkah everyone! It’s that time of year when Jews the world over pretend that our winter holiday is as fun and important as Christmas! Well, I happen to think there is no need for pretending. Not only is Hannukah 8 days instead of 1 (or 1.5, ish), but the traditional food is simply fried stuff. For Christmas, the holiday calls for turkey, goose, crap like that. But for Channukah, you just have to fry shit up! Whatever you want! It’s like a vegan’s dream! Unless you’re one of those vegans.
Why do we fry shit, you ask? Well, Channakah celebrates one of the many, many times the Jews were persecuted and driven from their land, but that time, they won! After the very serious and tragic war, of which I know many details, them fightin’ Jews – or really the Maccabees, I think this is when that word became a thing – sought refuge in a Temple and tried to light the Menorah to commemorate their victory. But they only found enough oil for one night. Oh well, they said, let’s light it up. And behold, the oil burned for 8 nights instead of just 1. It was a miracle! And so we celebrate Hahnuckah for 8 nights, and we celebrate by putting a culinary spotlight on burning oil, i.e., frying stuff. It’s a magical time.
During this Chabanakah, I will share several fun recipes for fried stuff. First up, I want to offer a way to do traditional latkes, or potato pancakes, but with a fun twist. There are tons of latke recipes out there, presenting perfect little fried circles of grated potato and onion. But I can’t be arsed with making perfect shapes when I fry. Ain’t nobody got time for that. Instead, I mixed long strings of sweet potato, zucchini, and just a little plain potato and fried them in big, messy birds’ nests, the ideal shape for throwing tons of dips or sauces into. This is also because I have a spiralizer and I don’t like using the grater. This is a versatile recipe so feel free to use whatever your heart desires. Except for less oil. Your heart loves oil.
During this Chabanakah, I will share several fun recipes for fried stuff. First up, I want to offer a way to do traditional latkes, or potato pancakes, but with a fun twist. There are tons of latke recipes out there, presenting perfect little fried circles of grated potato and onion. But I can’t be arsed with making perfect shapes when I fry. Ain’t nobody got time for that. Instead, I mixed long strings of sweet potato, zucchini, and just a little plain potato and fried them in big, messy birds’ nests, the ideal shape for throwing tons of dips or sauces into. This is also because I have a spiralizer and I don’t like using the grater. This is a versatile recipe so feel free to use whatever your heart desires. Except for less oil. Your heart loves oil.
Zucchini & Sweet Potato Birds’ Nests Latkes
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Ingredients:
Directions:
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It’s so beeyootiful! 
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I like my big messy nesty latkes with ketchup. I know that is kind of gross. But the traditional sour cream is much grosser. Applesauce is the other traditional latke dip, but that’s weird to me. I don’t like mixing fruit in my savory food! In an awesome twist, I put mac & cheese on top of these tonight. Stay tuned for that mac & cheese in the next post!
