Madrid: It's Pretty Awesome Even If You Don't See Penelope & Javierby Randi / July 28, 2015
In our short time in Madrid, we weren’t able to hit all the vegan spots I put on my list. (I was saving my food-tour kind of living for Austin.) Adding to the struggle was that we found at least two spots closed when they were supposed to be open. (I hate Uncle Siesta!) Luckily, we did get to eat at B13, an all-vegan bar the name of which I assume refers to how they’re even better than vitamin b12. Or that like b12, vegans need them. I doubt it’s that. It’s a cool, chill, punk-ish hole-in-the-wall with an unreliable but fun menu. The food was decent, nothing extraordinary, and at times hilarious, but it was just a treat to have an entirely vegan place, even if that place smelled of spilled beer and felt like it too.
globbible
We were very hungry after a day of walking and wandering, so we were happy when they brought a complimentary starter of bread and ‘salad’. Or were we? This was one of the most hilarious plates of food. In the middle of two pieces of bread was a mayonnaise-y clump of mayonnaise, as far as I could tell. Or potato salad, but the mayo outweighed the presence of potato and other vegetables. Yes, it was vegan (doesn’t look like it!), but still, there’s not much that’s appetizing about a big puddle of mayo, vegan or not. Not the most auspicious start, although it did taste okay in little bites. It’s hard to tell, but this was a huge portion. We tried to attack it at various points in the meal but it was just too much for our soft Western feet.
Not having had enough beige, our first food order was calamari. Having fried calamari on the menu was a main reason I wanted to go to B13, because it used to be my faaavorite. And guess what that came with? More bread!
beige food, beige food, a-whatcha gonna do
The calamari was pretty good! It didn’t have a discernible fishy taste, which I think is a good move, and it was maybe more like very chewy onion rings, but it was one of the more enjoyable fried foods I’ve eaten. The hunk of bread we could have done without. Perhaps a salad (not of mayo) would have complemented it better.
I was also lured to B13 because it actually has vegan Spanish omelette, the staple dish of potato-filled omelette. It’s so good and I really really wanted a vegan version. Guess what. None that day. They also were out of the croquettes, which sounded great. Arghaaanauts.
I was also lured to B13 because it actually has vegan Spanish omelette, the staple dish of potato-filled omelette. It’s so good and I really really wanted a vegan version. Guess what. None that day. They also were out of the croquettes, which sounded great. Arghaaanauts.
For our mains, we created two combo platters. The combo platter situation was quite something. You can pick one item from three different sections, which we did. So, three separate items, okay. One of ours came out as expected, like a full plate of food. But one was kind of funny in execution. For this unexpectedly funny one, we chose the sausages, the green peppers, and hummus. Like, it was three foods. On a plate. Just chilling. This is kind of weird, right?
I mean, yes, here we have sausages, hummus, and peppers, which we did order, but they’re just, I don’t know, sitting there! All the components are just sitting there. I don’t know, it’s a weird plate! This also came with a basket of bread. It’s like a deconstructed plate of food or something. Weird. The peppers were really great, grilled until they were super soft. Although I may have just been excited about seeing a non-mayoed vegetable. No they were good. And the hummus was quite enjoyable, as almost all hummus is, despite it being the first food that needed bread but the 3rd dish that came with bread.
The other combo platter we made was the breaded seitan steak with salad and onion rings. Hrm. This seitan steak was…weird. It was super soft ‘seitan’, like you could tell it was maybe made with flour and not vital wheat gluten and not made correctly, and it was suuuuper sweet. It actually tasted like a maple syrup-covered pancake. But it was seitan. Husband couldn’t eat it. I tried. I did not fully succeed.
The other combo platter we made was the breaded seitan steak with salad and onion rings. Hrm. This seitan steak was…weird. It was super soft ‘seitan’, like you could tell it was maybe made with flour and not vital wheat gluten and not made correctly, and it was suuuuper sweet. It actually tasted like a maple syrup-covered pancake. But it was seitan. Husband couldn’t eat it. I tried. I did not fully succeed.
At least this plate looks more like an actual plate of food, right? And that salad was so good. Well, it was average normal green salad with tomatoes and carrots, but I was so happy to see it after all this beige. The onion rings were decent but unnecessary. If I returned, I would combo platter the burger, which we didn’t try and I bet is really good just because of odds, the salad, and the peppers.
This is the point where our story gets very very sad. One of the best parts about B13 is that they have soy milkshakes! And milkshakes are one of the best foods out there! The availability of milkshakes was my #1 reason for wanting to go to B13. You’ve probably already guessed what happened: no milkshakes that day. Sadface.
They did have one last piece of cream cake. Or pie. I am not really sure what this was, but it had a wide layer of light thick sweet cream that was just really really good. The wondrous fluffy cream came on top of a spongy vanilla cake layer, and it was all topped with delicious caramel-ly crushed nuts. So yay for that.
This is the point where our story gets very very sad. One of the best parts about B13 is that they have soy milkshakes! And milkshakes are one of the best foods out there! The availability of milkshakes was my #1 reason for wanting to go to B13. You’ve probably already guessed what happened: no milkshakes that day. Sadface.
They did have one last piece of cream cake. Or pie. I am not really sure what this was, but it had a wide layer of light thick sweet cream that was just really really good. The wondrous fluffy cream came on top of a spongy vanilla cake layer, and it was all topped with delicious caramel-ly crushed nuts. So yay for that.
thank you. thank you. thank god for you.
B13, MADRID, SPAIN
Water speed: Hooray for a carafe, though refills were slow.
Service: Staff is mostly behind the bar, which we were near, so we could talk to them easily.
Bathrooms: One or two very typical bar bathrooms.
Food: Disappointing if you want great food (or anything you were jonesing for on the menu), but good if you just need somewhere vegan.
Bonus: An all-vegan place in the middle of any city is pretty cool!
Water speed: Hooray for a carafe, though refills were slow.
Service: Staff is mostly behind the bar, which we were near, so we could talk to them easily.
Bathrooms: One or two very typical bar bathrooms.
Food: Disappointing if you want great food (or anything you were jonesing for on the menu), but good if you just need somewhere vegan.
Bonus: An all-vegan place in the middle of any city is pretty cool!
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Sarajevo Vegan Scene: Karuzo Vegetarian Restaurant
Karuzo is a shining star in the Sarajevo vegetarian scene. (I mean, there’s not really a scene.) Karuzo is the kind of restaurant that focuses on your experience, works with you, and provides you with great food (and dessert).
So, NB: You really need a reservation – not because it’s crowded, but because the one owner/chef/waiter/host needs to know to expect you! We showed up for lunch one day, but O/C/W/H said it would take awhile to get food to us since he wasn’t expecting us and nothing was prepped yet. So instead we came back later for dinner. It was a good move! A varied and extensive menu was available, even with some specials added to the regular long menu.
So, NB: You really need a reservation – not because it’s crowded, but because the one owner/chef/waiter/host needs to know to expect you! We showed up for lunch one day, but O/C/W/H said it would take awhile to get food to us since he wasn’t expecting us and nothing was prepped yet. So instead we came back later for dinner. It was a good move! A varied and extensive menu was available, even with some specials added to the regular long menu.
Lentil soup with chard
To start, we ordered two soups – one Thai mushroom, one lentil soup with Swiss chard and spiced tofu. Both were great! The Thai mushroom soup had the right amount of tanginess and an interesting mix of vegetables. The lentil was much brothier than lentil soup as I know it, but it was good and still comforting. Boyfriend was nervous about the tofu (he hates tofu chunks) but it was shredded so tiny that you couldn’t tell it was tofu.
 Thai mushroom soup |
 Chana dal |
Seitan with vegetables
For our entrees, I ordered the homemade seitan with vegetables. I couldn’t pass up the chance to have his homemade seitan, and while it was much different from seitan that I’ve had, it was pretty good. It was cut into matchsticks, which must have helped develop the good texture.
Boyfriend ordered the chana dal, because he can’t go too long without Indian food. This was also delicious, which was impressive considering we weren’t in an Indian restaurant! The beans were on a bed of really good rice, sprinkled with herbs, scallions, and cashews. Everything was just great.
Well, I thought I knew what great was, but then the dessert came. The man (I really should have gotten his name. Maybe it’s Karuzo? Robinson Karuzo it is) said he had a special ‘strawberry surprise’, a towering take on strawberry shortcake, with plain and chocolate-coated cake rounds, berries, and ridiculous vegan cream.
Boyfriend ordered the chana dal, because he can’t go too long without Indian food. This was also delicious, which was impressive considering we weren’t in an Indian restaurant! The beans were on a bed of really good rice, sprinkled with herbs, scallions, and cashews. Everything was just great.
Well, I thought I knew what great was, but then the dessert came. The man (I really should have gotten his name. Maybe it’s Karuzo? Robinson Karuzo it is) said he had a special ‘strawberry surprise’, a towering take on strawberry shortcake, with plain and chocolate-coated cake rounds, berries, and ridiculous vegan cream.
Strawberry surprise
I was astounded by the cream. My boyfriend joked “The surprise is that it’s not vegan!” but I was assured it was. This was so freaking amazing.
All in all, we had a great time at Karuzo. We expected it to take a really long time, and while it wasn’t quick, the service was fine. We talked with the owner about veganism and special diets for a while, and looked through his cookbook (which is available for sale). It’s a very cute restaurant, tiny and narrow, with perhaps seven tables lining the inside, and a handful outside. It’s decorated like an old ship, with dark wood, nets, maps, and other knickknacks. Also – it takes credit cards. Very few places in Bosnia do, so this was a huge benefit. Not that it was a huge problem here to come up with cash – for this kind of higher-level dining experience, it cost only 63 marks before tip, about 30 euro.
All in all, we had a great time at Karuzo. We expected it to take a really long time, and while it wasn’t quick, the service was fine. We talked with the owner about veganism and special diets for a while, and looked through his cookbook (which is available for sale). It’s a very cute restaurant, tiny and narrow, with perhaps seven tables lining the inside, and a handful outside. It’s decorated like an old ship, with dark wood, nets, maps, and other knickknacks. Also – it takes credit cards. Very few places in Bosnia do, so this was a huge benefit. Not that it was a huge problem here to come up with cash – for this kind of higher-level dining experience, it cost only 63 marks before tip, about 30 euro.
Karuzo, Sarajevo
- Water speed: We were given a big glass pitcher, which I love. Took a bit to get it refilled, but that’s understandable given the setup.
- Bathrooms: It’s down the stairs, past the small kitchen, and behind a birdcage (with a bird in it). I kind of love it.
- Service: Understandably slow, given that one man is doing literally every job, but not maddeningly so
- Food: Great! Especially dessert. Oh man.
- Bonus: Takes credit cards and has free wifi! Bring your smartphones!
The Best Vegan Restaurant in London: Club Mexicana at Spread Eagle Pub
I know, I’m going super big and bold with that title but you know what? It is 8 sleeps till Christmas and as ‘Love, Actually’ told us, “it’s Christmas, and at Christmas, you tell the truth” (there’s a lot of weird shit in that movie but that’s probably the strangest statement passed off as universal knowledge). And that’s the truth, babies! Club Mexicana, formerly at the Dalston bar Pamela and now at the Spread Eagle Pub in Hackney, is serving up the best vegan food of any restaurant in the city. That’s an incredible feat, considering it’s Mexican (or “Mexican-inspired”) food, a cuisine London just cannot do well (it’s understandable given how far we are from Mexico but still). But for Club Mexicana, every single dish is a stellar achievement. Everything we tried absolutely wowed us, and even though we were so full we wanted to shout for another round of everything. If this new location were closer to me (it’s a PITA) I’d be there every week.
Even though London is positively crammed full of vegan options, I find that vegan restaurants here are mostly fine, not great. The best food in town is always, always found at stalls in street market set-ups, which are plentiful. So it’s no surprise that Club Mexicana started as one of those food stalls, in the Camden market. They still maintain their street food cred with stalls here and there, but their residency at the Spread Eagle is the way to go. It’s a cool, quirky pub, with vintage jazzy decor and candlelight. Like I said, this new location is inconvenient for me and I wish they had some delivery system worked out, but alas, it will remain a super special option for when we feel like sitting on buses for hours. And honestly, it would be so worth it.
We went recently when a friend was visiting and had simply the best meal in ages. Everything we ordered was sensational. My only issue was our table placement – we were right at the end of the bar, by the gap where servers had to continually go in and out of the bar area and where other customers would need to walk to enter the restaurant so we were jostled the entire time and it was tres annoying, . If you book in with them, request that you don’t get this table. I wanted to shout DON’T YOU KNOW WHO I AM but the situation on its face proved that the answer would be in the negative.
Other than that, it was the best. We started with nachos, as you have to do. When Club Mexicana first appeared on the scene and had one of their early pop-ups, I complained (of course I did) about how the nacho toppings, though fantastic, were stingy and left you with a basket of dry corn chips after not too long. Well, they kindly responded and instead of calling me out for complaining all the time, they said they would start putting all the good stuff on all the chip layers. That was almost four years ago! Obviously, they have the best nachos now, with great guacamole, red pepper queso, their signature pink onions, salsa, pickled jalapenos, sour cream, and chipotle chili oil. All I can do is quote the Hormone Monstress (see caption/watch “Big Mouth”).
“That was BEAUTIFUL!!! NO NOTES!”
Next on the small plate list was chipotle roasted pumpkin wedges. I didn’t think these would be too special because I was like “I eat pumpkin and other wintry squashes all the time, what could you do to blow me away?” but of course I was wrong because these trickster pumpkin wedges were amazing. They were big and delicious and cooked perfectly so there was no toughness left but they still had shape, and the chive aioli was perfect. It could have possibly used more to life up the flavor more but still, so good.
“Beautifully done my little yoda”
One of the most impressive Club Mexicana creations is their Mexican fried chicken wings, so we had to get an order. They have the perfect texture and the spicy fried coating is incredible. Served with salsa verde, sour cream, and hot sauce, this dish will make any dining companion a CM convert for life. I just wish the serving was bigger and that maybe the sour cream came in a separate container so there could be more for dipping.
“Hello my precious little ravioli”
I also got to try the annato glazed chicken skewers. If you’re choosing between the wings and the skewers, I think I’d give the edge to the wings, but you know what, don’t choose! Order both like we did. The skewers come in the most incredible queso sauce that we found ourselves dipping everything else into. I realize now that I don’t have a picture of the skewers, which makes me wonder if I’m dreaming up the whole thing.
The last of our small plates was the Al Pastor cauliflower, with charred pineapple, sour cream, and toasted cashews. The Al Pastor sandwich from Cinnamon Snail is one of my all-times, so it’s no surprise that this amazing flavor combo worked wonders on bites of fried cauliflower. Honestly cauliflower has no business being this good.
Onto the mains! For the bigger plates, we chose to get combos of their three taco offerings. They offer the tacos 3 for 10$ (that’s pounddollars) so you really can’t say no to that! My favorie upon favorites is the Baja tofish. Their tofish is the stuff of legend, and for dern good reason. It really is the best vegan fish anything ever. Man alive it’s incredible. The tofish taco is served with pickled cabbage, salsa verde, sour cream, and pickled chilis and it’s just perfection. The other two tacos are strong as well: we tried the jackfruit barbacoa (beef style jackfruit in salsa roja, roasted padron peppers, salsa verde, and sour cream) and the chorizo & potato (with salsa verde, chipotle mayo, pico de gallo, and pickled jalapeno). All three are sensational, really, but I think next time I should stop fooling myself and just get three of the tofish. I’m kind of obsessed.
You probably know by now that I’m weirdly obsessed with salad, and I try to force lettuce into most of my meals, so it should be no surprise that we (I) also ordered the autumn salad. It was a really big portion, great for sharing, and it was filled with roasted cauliflower, charred pumpkin, candied beetroot, mixed leaves, Mexican slaw, jalapeno-mango salsa, chive aioli, and toasted cashews. This was a fantastic salad, although it would benefit from cutting the leaves and the spiralized veggies into small, more manageable pieces. And it could have used more dressing, and more of a creamier one at that. But as salads go in places where your tablemates scoff at you for ordering a salad, this was among the better ones.
No trip to Club Mexicana is complete without dessert. They proved they know what’s up back at Pamela with their Choco Taco offering, oh man. While that was missing from the Spread Eagle menu, they more than made up for it with the current dessert list: a lemon & blueberry taco stack, and deep fried ice cream. Now, listen. The ice cream is from Black Mylk, which is just the greatest vegan ice cream maker in London, nbd. So I was so stoked to be able to get their ice cream here and not just at their stall in weekend markets hither and thither. Because their ice cream is so good, I wanted it just plain, not fried. But the staff said they couldn’t do that because it’s already prepped with the frying mixture or whatever. I was kind of annoyed, but there was no reason to be, because as intended with the crunchy fried coating, it is unbelievably delicious. They offer the deep fried ice cream in three flavors: Mexican chili chocolate, toasted honeycomb, and black rice horchata. Since there were three of us, we got all three! They are all wonderful but I think the horchata is my favorite, followed by the honeycomb. You really can’t go wrong though. I bet you think that’s all we got for dessert, but we also decided to get the taco stack! It’s sweet fried corn tortillas separated with layers of whipped vanilla cream, lemon curd, and blueberry coulis. Fruit desserts are not my thing, but this was very good. While I’m more of a reserved positive about it, my two companions were blown away by it, so you should give it a try. The homemade lemon curd is really impressive, as is the whipped cream, which I could have eaten a whole bowl of.
the little drink umbrellas in the ice cream lolol
So clearly you have to get to the Spread Eagle asap for some incredible Mexican vegan food. You can’t go wrong with your order, but to be safe, order everything! It’s all so good. Just please bring me if you go.
CLUB MEXICANA AT THE SPREAD EAGLE PUB, LONDON
Water speed: Actually great! They brought carafes and kept them coming, THANK YOU!
Service: Mostly fine.
Bathrooms: A step up from your typical pub bathroom, and a big improvement from Pamela.
Food: SUH. BLIME. Actually great Mexican food in London!
Bonus: We saw Kit Harington sitting nearby at the bar! We were so excited and stared a little too intently. Realized after several minutes of staring that it wasn’t him. BUT IT COULD HAVE BEEN.
