Chappy Chanukah! Let's Fry Up Some Birds' Nest Latkes!by Randi / December 18, 2014
Happy Hanukkah continued! What a great holiday! Yesterday, I promised to share more posts about frying random foods, because Hannukah is about oil and what not. Mac & cheese was mentioned, and I’m not one to go back on my word. Well, I fried mac & cheese today. I’m going to tell you how to do it, but I’m not sure whether I recommend you actually follow suit. It was weird. Some of you may have been lucky enough to try the fried mac & cheese burger at Portland’s White Owl Social Club before it left the menu, but I was silly and I ordered something else the one time I was there. Some people said a fried ball of vegan mac & cheese was amazing. Some said it was disgusting. I set out to see for myself.
Well, I tried to make it into balls. I know now why every non-vegan recipe for deep-fried mac & cheese relies on egg mixed into the macaroni. Pasta balls really like falling apart! It turned into more of a patty, even though I mashed the pasta up pretty well. I’m sure it still tastes the same. That taste, by the way, is tempura skin. I guess that is just ‘fried’. Every time I have fried food, I remember that I don’t really like it. And then I forget and try again like 12 hours later, apparently. Someone remind me next time that I don’t like fried food. Anyway, here are some ‘instructions’.
Fried Mac & Cheese
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If you figure out a way to get the pasta to stay together better that isn’t real egg or flax egg (that would not taste good), let me know please. I didn’t have the will to try again. Too much frying.
Ingredients:
Directions:
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 Simpsons-shaped pasta not required  There’s a mac ball in there!  |
Just a ball and a patty in a little canoe with the moon shining all around
Enjoy?
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Happy Thanksgiving! Vegan Recipes and a Full How-To Guide…Sort of
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!
Even though my last name rhymes with Pilgrim, Thanksgiving was never my favorite holiday. I hate how people focus on the actual turkey, on all the death and suffering masquerading as the central food and important ‘tradition’, rather than making it just about being with people you love. (Or despise.) But I loved being with my family and playing games and laughing a lot. And of course sneaking vegan sides and desserts into the mix! This year, I’m not with my family. I’m not even in America for chrissakes! But we’re still celebrating Thanksgiving. I miss not having lots of people around, but I do get to have my first entirely vegan Thanksgiving dinner! Yay!!
Even though my last name rhymes with Pilgrim, Thanksgiving was never my favorite holiday. I hate how people focus on the actual turkey, on all the death and suffering masquerading as the central food and important ‘tradition’, rather than making it just about being with people you love. (Or despise.) But I loved being with my family and playing games and laughing a lot. And of course sneaking vegan sides and desserts into the mix! This year, I’m not with my family. I’m not even in America for chrissakes! But we’re still celebrating Thanksgiving. I miss not having lots of people around, but I do get to have my first entirely vegan Thanksgiving dinner! Yay!!
Apparently the Brits are willing to make me smile today, because not only are the Thanksgiving episodes of “How I Met Your Mother” playing on TV, but the commercials they just ran during them showed Philly City Hall AND the American show “Paternity Court”! The caption said “You’re the father” and the guy just FAINTED flat out! It was the best thing.
Anyway, I made tons of food over the past few days, mostly things I’ve never made before. Thanksgiving is about tradition and making the same stuff every year? F that! This is your chance to be a vegan chef all-star and show off. Okay you can do that with the same old favorites I guess. I’m sorry, ‘favourites’.
First, the most important thing to decide is what you’ll be having for dessert. Then work up the rest of the meal from there! It’s like how people choose their shoes first and then plan the rest of their outfit. (Does anybody actually do that?) You’ll have to make it to the end of this post to see our treasure treats.
Anyway, I made tons of food over the past few days, mostly things I’ve never made before. Thanksgiving is about tradition and making the same stuff every year? F that! This is your chance to be a vegan chef all-star and show off. Okay you can do that with the same old favorites I guess. I’m sorry, ‘favourites’.
First, the most important thing to decide is what you’ll be having for dessert. Then work up the rest of the meal from there! It’s like how people choose their shoes first and then plan the rest of their outfit. (Does anybody actually do that?) You’ll have to make it to the end of this post to see our treasure treats.
Or I guess I’ll just share the picture now.
Next, you want to check off the important sides. Do you want mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, stuffing? All three? I would have made all three if it wasn’t going to just be my husband and me for dinner. I decided on mashed potatoes, garlicked.
Do you want to eat greens this year? I did, so I roasted some Brussels sprouts in olive oil and pink salt. The best is that there were literally 8 sprouts in the package I bought. It’s like the most paltry showing of vegetables at any meal ever.
Good evening, TWO Brussels sprouts
Which gravy will you make? Is it a mushroom-based gravy? Is it from a recipe or something you wing? For me, it’s the Punk Rock Chickpea Gravy from “Vegan with a Vengeance”, with extra soy and nooch, and with butterbeans because the chickpeas in England DO NOT MASH. I tried mashing chickpeas here and the little f-ers evaded the pressure Every. Single. Time. Then I tried just squeezing them to death with my hands and they POPPED OUT ACROSS THE ROOM. And I am pretty strong. I just…the chickpeas here are possessed.
More sides more sides! If I had my druthers I would probably say druthers more and then have made some kind of kale thing. But luckily, Husband requested the green bean casserole of his younger days. Now, I realize that so many of you have had green bean casserole at every single Thanksgiving dinner with your families. It’s like a huge thing right? I never even heard of it until Isa posted a recipe on the PPK a few years ago. I know! But Husband’s family always had it so I had to make it even though green beans roasted in mushroom soup sounds revolting. I planned on using Isa’s recipe but couldn’t find vegan mushroom soup for the life of me, so my friend Elli (who is too cool for blogging) helped me out. Recipe below!! And guess what….it’s freaking AMAZING. Convert over here.
Then, what’s your main?! Will you make the famous chickpea cutlets? (Yes.) Or did you buy a Tofurky roast in America where it costs like $8 and not like here where the high street Whole Foods sells them for THIRTY FREAKING POUNDS?? (That is about $100 dollars.) Even if you gave me the money for that, I could not stomach buying it for that price. Even if Donald Trump himself was like, I’m kind of an ass, but here’s a million dollars; you must spend it on overpriced Tofurky. Okay maybe then I would. Unless the money smelled like cheese.
And then make cranberry sauce. No one eats it, right, but if it’s not there it pisses off Santa or something. Also, making it from scratch makes all your pots and stirrer majiggies a beautiful deep pink through the next few uses.
OH OH and biscuits!! You can make pumpkin biscuits if you want. I guess that would make sense. But this year I veganized Alton Brown’s perfect regular southern biscuit recipe and they are delicious. Recipe below!
So if you followed my instructions? guidelines? stream-of-consciousness blogging style that we all have learned to love/deal with? you now have a killer menu that would impress even the pickiest omnivore on this oh so special American day! This was my menu. I made all of it from scratch!! So proud!
- Perfect Southern biscuits (recipe below!)
- Roasted Brussels sprouts
- Cranberry sauce (recipe below!)
- Punk Rock chickpea gravy from Vegan with a Vengeance
- Isa’s chickpea seitan cutlets
- Traditional green bean casserole (recipe below!)
- Mashed potatoes (recipe below!)
- Pumpkin cheesecake from Vegan Pie In The Sky
- Brownie bottom peanut butter fudge pie (I’ll share a recipe another day if people ask for it)
GREEN BEAN CASSEROLE
I had no idea about this so-called traditional Thanks day dish until after I went vegan! Crazy! I was going to make the PPK version, but I couldn’t find vegan cream of mushroom soup. So my vegan food guru Elli (@catsxdogs on instagram) told me how to make a delicious version without store-bought soup! Yay!
Ingredients:
Ingredients:
- 400g green beans (That’s just what it said on the package! I don’t even know what 400g translates to in America talk! I’ve been here too long already! Okay I googled it and it’s like 14 oz. That doesn’t help me at all. Use like a pound.)
- olive oil
- 1 small onion, diced
- 3 cloves garlic, minced
- 1 pound basic white mushrooms, sliced
- 1 teaspoon salt
- fresh ground black pepper to taste
- ¼ cup white flour
- 2 tablespoons vegan butter
- 2 very strong bouillon cubes (I used one liquidy pot kind and one organic powdery kind. Diversity!)
- 2 cups plain unsweetened almond milk
- 2 cups crispy fried onions (storebought, don’t make these yourself you crazy animal)
Directions:
- Clean, trim, and chop your green beans.
- Boil them in salted water for 7 minutes. Drain and leave in colander for some minutes.
- In a large saucepan, sauté the onion and garlic in a bit of olive oil for about 6 minutes over medium heat.
- Add the mushrooms, salt, and pepper, and cook down. Stir to avoid burning.
- Add the flour and butter and cook for another minute.
- Add the bouillon cubes and plain almond milk and stir stir stir!
- Cook, stirring, until thickened.
- Remove from heat and mix in green beans.
- Mix one cup of your fried onions into the whole shebang.
- *NB: If you are making this ahead of time, stop here, cover with tin foil, and refrigerate until ready to bake.
- Preheat oven to 425F.
- Spread the whole mix into a casserole pan at least 1 inch deep.
- Spread the rest of your fried onions over the top of the casserole.
- Bake for 20 minutes. Cover lightly with tin foil if you fear your onions will burn.
- Say ta dah!
MASHED POTATOES
Not so much a recipe as a reminder. You prob know what to do but here’s what I did!
Ingredients:
Ingredients:
- 2 pounds small potatoes (not like ‘hey that’s just small potatoes’, but actual small potatoes.)
- 1/3 cup vegan butter (you may say that’s a lot but I’m a dreamer/it’s Thanksgiving!)
- 1/2 cup unsweetened plain soy milk
- 1/2 teaspoon garlic granules
Directions:
- Boil the potatoes in a big pot of salted water. I let them go for about 20 minutes just to be sure.
- Drain but keep the potatoes in the pot.
- Add the rest of the ingredients.
- Mash it with a masher until desired consistency. I used a masher for the first time today and it was SO fun. Much better than using an immersion blender.
- Say ta dah!
CRANBERRY SAUCE
so fancy
I could only find frozen cranberries, so if you are using fresh, you probably have to add a bit more water to adjust for the ice melt. Or, if you are in America, your cranberry bag probably has a/this recipe!
Ingredients:
Ingredients:
- 1 pound cranberries
- ½ cup sugar
- 1 cup water
Directions:
- Mix the water and sugar in a big pot.
- Add the cranberries.
- Boil!
- Boil and stir!
- Are the cranberries popping open?
- Keep stirring as it boils!
- Is it getting thick?
- Do this for like 10 minutes then let it sit for 15 or till cool.
PERFECT SOUTHERN BISCUITS
Biscuits, man! Ughhh so good!
Ingredients:
- 2 cups all-purpose flour
- 1 tablespoon baking powder
- ½ teaspoon baking soda
- 1 teaspoon salt
- ¼ cup vegan butter (boy I wish they sold Earth Balance here)
- 1 cup unsweetened plain soy milk
- 2 teaspoons apple cider vinegar
Directions:
- Preheat oven to 425F.
- Add the milk and vinegar in a measuring cup. Put it in the fridge!
- Mix the dry ingredients in a mixing bowl.
- Add the butter with your fingers or a pastry cutter. I have a pastry cutter and I thought it was the bee’s knees but lately I’ve been using my fingers. Weird.
- Get the curdly milk out from the fridge and pour it in the bowl.
- Mix ever so gently, super gently, to get all the flour mixed in.
- Don’t overwork the dough. The Alton directions say to knead and roll out and cut into circles, but this was the stickiest dough I’ve ever come across, so I made drop biscuits.
- Drop ½ cup size spoonfuls on a parchment lined baking sheet.
- Bake for 16 minutes.
- Say ta dah!
Finish it off with at least one pie per person and you are a golden vegan!
Definitely make the Pumpkin Cheesecake. It’s so good, especially with a Speculoos cookie crust! Here is the recipe. I never do the pecan topping because who needs it? Also, I like seeing the swirl!
Definitely make the Pumpkin Cheesecake. It’s so good, especially with a Speculoos cookie crust! Here is the recipe. I never do the pecan topping because who needs it? Also, I like seeing the swirl!
I also made a Brownie Bottom Peanut Butter Fudge pie!
I hope your Thanksgiving was wonderful! It’s so nice to have a completely vegan holiday. I can’t wait until the next one! I guess that’s Christmas. I guess I have to make two pies per person for that one. Because of Jesus.
We barely made a dent, haha. Come over for leftovers! Also husband got me flowers! So nice!
Love From Philly: Han Dynasty Is Your New Favorite Dynasty
Philly’s best Chinese restaurant is actually the best Chinese restaurant in the country. Important and wise critics actually say that, not just me, and everyone I know who has eaten at Han Dynasty agrees. Offering an authentic, super-spicy Szechuan-based cuisine, it’s so far from your usual Chinese restaurant that you probably won’t know where to begin. Luckily, I’m here to help. The menu is a favorite of omnivores but there is so much insane food for vegans to eat that I consider this one of my top vegan recommendations for Philly and the surrounding area (they have several outputs in the burbs and in NYC now, so famous).
The menu is set up to be user-friendly, with spice rankings from 1 to 10 accompanying each dish (the 10s are mind-blowing, and will melt your face; so will some 5s) so you know what you are getting into. Making Han Dynasty super vegan friendly is that each dish is described in terms of how its made and how its seasoned, and then you choose what protein you want it based around (I know, I hate using that word like that but it works). Tofu is available as the protein in the majority of dishes, so vegans unite! Also, Han himself is really nice and helpful. Well, now he’s like the new it-boy of the restaurant world (and now NYC claims Handy as its own), but back when he actually worked in the Old City Philly kitchen, he was always willing to talk about what was vegan and what was not. Thankfully, there is so much besides the many tofu-based entrees for us to eat. (Also the twitter account is @handynastyphila and so I refer to this restaurant as Handy in shorthand. Best lack of punctuation.)
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The #1 dish at Han Dynasty is how everyone I know always starts the meal: the Spicy Crispy Cucumber. It’s not crispy from frying; it’s crispy because it’s the freshest cucumber you’ve ever eaten, and it’s the most perfectly prepared raw cucumber you can imagine. I think even people who don’t like cucumber would go nuts over this dish. The spicy part is not a joke. The cucumber is bathed in a sort-of sweet, exceedingly hot yet light chili marinade. After the cucumber is gone, I always want to drink what’s leftover in the bowl because it’s that good. (I don’t because I don’t want to destroy my insides.) One day, I will successfully recreate how magical this dish is, but for now, you have to leave it in Handy’s hands…ies.
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My other favorites (I mean everything I’ve had is a favorite, but these are things I’ll order every single time) are the Cold Sesame Noodles and the Dan Dan Noodles without pork. (Specify that you want them without pork and vegetarian.) The sesame noodles are a classic that I’m sure you’ve had before, but these are the best you can ever imagine. Last time I was here, we ordered multiple bowls even though we were too full to finish other dishes. Definitely over-order these because everyone will keep eating them past fullness, and also they are amazing out of the fridge the next day. As for the Dan Dan, if you are familiar with Szechuan, you know that these noodles are super important and vital to the cuisine. They are amazing. Oh my goodness. I don’t know what’s in them, because the internet shows me that Dan Dan is usually in a broth full of mustard greens, but Handy’s are in more of a thin paste. Regardless, these are incredible and you must eat them. Also – it’s an 8 spice level. And an 8 feels like a 10.
Recently, I actually tried a new noodle. (In addition, obviously, not as a replacement.) I ordered the mung bean noodles in black bean sauce (another 8 spice level). While I didn’t get the black bean sauce aspect (I may have just been given the other mung bean noodle dish), I did like the strange as hell consistency of the noodles themselves. They are soft and gelatinous; you cannot pick them up with chopsticks (they cut right through) and a fork only barely does the job. I don’t know, I like having to work for my food I guess. Anyway, they were very interesting and cool, but if you can’t handle three noodle dishes, stick to the two above.
Now let’s get to the entrees. I am obsessed beyond words and beyond belief with Handy’s tofu. No matter what form you get it in, the tofu is the densest, most perfectly chewy and strong I have ever encountered. I don’t know what they do to make it so superb. It’s like it was pressed for years.
Now let’s get to the entrees. I am obsessed beyond words and beyond belief with Handy’s tofu. No matter what form you get it in, the tofu is the densest, most perfectly chewy and strong I have ever encountered. I don’t know what they do to make it so superb. It’s like it was pressed for years.
Above is the Hot Sauce Style tofu, chock full of scallions, some kind of green, and the largest amount of chili and peppercorns I’ve ever seen in one dish. Can you even believe that? There were more peppercorns in the chili oil below the top bed of food. This was a 7, by the way, and my mouth was on fire for a long time. I love how amazingly hot everything is while still having a wonderful taste. That’s super hard to do.
Another one of my favorites is the Garlic Sauce Tofu, which is perfect if you cannot handle the vast amount of chili oil and heat in most of the other dishes. This dish is kind of sweet and sour, with wood ear mushrooms, bamboo, ginger, garlic, and peppers. It’s really delicious, as everything is here, and it’s a great option.
However, my top recommendation is the Long Hot Pepper Style Tofu. Oh my gosh. This is where Handy’s magic tofu shines brightest. It’s a very simple dish, with the perfect long strips of tofu mixed with long green hot peppers in a very light stir fry sauce. It’s only a spice level 3, but it seems a tad higher, and the taste is so perfect that it doesn’t even matter.
Another one of my favorites is the Garlic Sauce Tofu, which is perfect if you cannot handle the vast amount of chili oil and heat in most of the other dishes. This dish is kind of sweet and sour, with wood ear mushrooms, bamboo, ginger, garlic, and peppers. It’s really delicious, as everything is here, and it’s a great option.
However, my top recommendation is the Long Hot Pepper Style Tofu. Oh my gosh. This is where Handy’s magic tofu shines brightest. It’s a very simple dish, with the perfect long strips of tofu mixed with long green hot peppers in a very light stir fry sauce. It’s only a spice level 3, but it seems a tad higher, and the taste is so perfect that it doesn’t even matter.
Ugh it’s amazing. Can you even believe that that is tofu? Because I can’t. So delicious! This one is also great to eat straight from the fridge the next day.
There are plenty of vegetable sides in case you somehow didn’t order enough food. My favorite is the bok choy with black mushrooms. Seriously, Handy has the most incredibly thick mushrooms I’ve ever had. They are perfection.
There are plenty of vegetable sides in case you somehow didn’t order enough food. My favorite is the bok choy with black mushrooms. Seriously, Handy has the most incredibly thick mushrooms I’ve ever had. They are perfection.
I crave Han Dynasty so often and I already miss it, even though I had it just days before I moved. Do me a favor and go immediately if you are in the Philly area. I have been to most of the new suburban outposts of the restaurant, and they all pretty much have the same menu and, more importantly, consistency in deliciousness across the board.
HAN DYNASTY, PHILADELPHIA (et al.)
Water speed: Great! It is a Chinese restaurant, after all!
Service: See above.
Bathrooms: There’s usually just one, which kind of sucks because everyone is drinking so much water to counter the spice.
Food: The best Szechuan outside of China. Maybe in China as well; feel free to sponsor a test trip for me.
Bonus: The best tofu you’ve ever had in your life.
