Veganz, Berlin: If Heaven Had A Storefront...by Randi / September 17, 2014
To celebrate our engagement, husband and I decided to treat ourselves to a fancypants dinner at Lucky Leek, an upscale all-vegan restaurant in Berlin. The food was stellar, but there were a few issues that prevent me from completely raving about it. However, based on the food alone I would definitely have to recommend Lucky Leek if you are looking for something lavish and delicious.
The restaurant itself was decorated simply and nicely, with lots of fresh plants and clean white and black decor. The menu options sounded delicious and was heavy on the spargel (asparagus), because it was spring and spargel (our new favorite word to say) was everywhere. We decided to each get the Chef’s Menu, which offered about five solid courses and several additional items. We got this for one good reason and one dumb reason (restaurant’s fault): Good reason: It sounded delicious and we were doing what Retta was telling us to do. Dumb reason: Only with the two of us getting the expensive 50 euro Chef’s Menu would we be able to hit the restaurant’s incredibly lame and stupid 100 euro credit card minimum. I mean…what restaurant on earth has a credit card minimum that high? That is super lame.
The only thing dumber? The restaurant would not give us tap water – you had to buy bottled water. I have never encountered this shittiness anywhere in the world. Even in cities where drinking the tap water would kill you, restaurants would still happily give it to you for free. Okay that’s a bad example but still. I am still battling rising blood pressure thinking about how stupid this is. If the food wasn’t so good, I would say let’s picket Lucky Leek with fire hoses until they give us free tap water. I mean, let’s do that anyway because I am starting to super hulk out again, but still, you should eat here because it is so damn good.
The only thing dumber? The restaurant would not give us tap water – you had to buy bottled water. I have never encountered this shittiness anywhere in the world. Even in cities where drinking the tap water would kill you, restaurants would still happily give it to you for free. Okay that’s a bad example but still. I am still battling rising blood pressure thinking about how stupid this is. If the food wasn’t so good, I would say let’s picket Lucky Leek with fire hoses until they give us free tap water. I mean, let’s do that anyway because I am starting to super hulk out again, but still, you should eat here because it is so damn good.
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We began with a really delicious amuse-bouche sent out from the kitchen with “our compliments”, which was nice but I was like “a better compliment would have been free tap water, yo. Or at least tell me I’m pretty.” Anyway, the amuse was a toasted carrot sandwich with a pepper and a pickle on top. It was delicious! I could have had 100 of them!
Our first real course was this fantastic salad that featured a raw zucchini roll-up filled with amazing truffled cheesy cream (I think the phrase cream cheese is disgusting even though I am from Philadelphia (snaps)). The salad was arugula, fancy carrots, and salted almonds in a potato dressing. I don’t really know what that means, but it was delicious. The main focus of the plate aside from the zucchini roll-up was kohlrabi carpaccio which was fantastic. Fanciest salad ever!
* Next up was this ‘spring consomme’, which was a lovely French-oniony soup with like wonton balls in the middle. Delicious wonton balls! It said it came with herbed pancake strips but I don’t remember that being the case, unless those little squares are the strips. The wonton was a cheesy semolina dumpling that was really yummy. * The standout dish was next, the pasta. I wrote in my notes that this ravioli dish was perfect! It had a ridiculously large spear of spargel across the top, and the ravioli was filled with more spargel! (Remember spargel is asparagus. We learn languages on this show!) The ravioli pasta itself was superb with that perfect chewiness and taste. It was in a Hollandaise sauce that was not disgusting; it was in fact delicious. The dish was spotted with beluga lentil samsa (which Google tells me is just a misspelled samosa, which wasn’t the case here) that was the perfect spargel accompaniment. It also was topped with ‘sage panache’ but that just sounds like a dapper old wise man. Like the nicest way to describe a dandy British man. That bloke is full of sage panache. Hahahahah. * THEN THEY GAVE US FRUIT SORBET TO CLEANSE OUR PALATES LIKE WE WERE FREAKING ROYALTY OR SOMETHING. It was melon and rose hip sorbet and it was so lovely! It throws me a little though to have dessert before the main main. (As a vegan, even the blandest lightest sorbet is usually our dessert, so my brain was like, oh man it’s over? And then it was hard to get out of that.) * The main main, or piece de resistance, as the menu actually said, was a “Seitan and Onion Roast Joint“, which I assume is similar to a Spike Lee Joint, but more delicious and filling and less upsetting in most ways. It came with potato and carrot puree, which is the kind of thing I make a lot (a LOT a lot) but obviously not as perfectly as this was. It also came with pak choy, which as far as I know is bok choy, but in Europe they call it pak choy and I kind of love the discrepancy and kind of hate it. But I love love bok/pak choy! And I will always welcome more greens on my plate! It was the perfect unexpected Asian accompaniment to the meat and potatoes. The joint was also topped with a beet and walnut confit and just wow everything was perfect. * Then came real dessert, a trio of uhhhmazing cake and cream confections. In the center was the raspberry cake, which was good but fruit flavored dessert is not my favorite when it could easily be chocolate instead. Much MUCH better was to the left, the coconut and nougat tartlet. Yes, that’s right, this entire meal was sponsored by the first Jon Lovitz episode of “Friends”. The crust of the tartlet (hehehe) was a bit shortbready, which normally I hate because it feels like my teeth are hurting, but this was fantastic – and cold, which helps. That middle layer of coconut nougat was incredible. Oh man. Just the most perfect layer of cream imaginable. Lastly, probably my favorite component was the mocha banana ice cream with the chocolate praline sticking out of it. I don’t usually like mocha or coffee flavors, but this was mostly banana with just a hint of something deeper and bolder. And I love ice cream so much. I don’t like that the amount of ice cream in this and every single restaurant is just that little ball that is so difficult to eat because you end up smearing most of it around the plate and you’re like, am I allowed to lick the plate? And you are like no, but then they should have just given you a large bowl of it to begin with. Anyway, it was fantastic, and that chocolate praline was like those really thin and crunchy Pepperidge Farm doodads but sooo much better. Everything was delicious and perfect and we were extremely stuffed at the end of it, as it should be.
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Carrot sandwich amuse-bouche 
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All in all, Lucky Leek was an absolutely fantastic meal, and if you are looking for something fancypants in Berlin, I can definitely recommend it. But bring a bottle of water with you — which is the dumbest thing to have to say about a fancypants restaurant, but I do not like being forced to pay for water.
LUCKY LEEK, BERLIN
Water speed: UGH FFS!
Bathrooms: Hilariously, the bathroom is in the back of the restaurant through a freaking beaded curtain, like in 1970s dorm rooms. So out of place and funny. Bathroom was fine.
Service: They were pretty nice, those water selling bastards.
Food: Delicious delicious delicious.
Bonus: Decent location. & maybe by the time you go they will have gotten the memo about the water? Go for the food.
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Club Mexicana: I Guess There Is Good Mexican Food in London!
For so long, I’ve been complaining about how England can’t do Mexican food: they don’t understand spicy food, you can’t get good avocados here, and there’s a dearth of Mexican immigrants. But an all-vegan market stall called Club Mexicana proved me wrong! Club Mexicana pops up at the various markets in London, including Spitalfields and King’s Cross. And this month, they’ve taken over the Hornbeam Cafe in…super northeast London to host fantastic Friday night dinners. (I mean dinner on Friday nights, not Shabbat-style ‘Friday night dinners’.) If you have a chance to get to god knows where I went last week (Walthamstow…shire?) any Friday this month, then you must go! They have loaded nachos, tacos, burritos, empanadas, and more. Most importantly, their signature dish is pulled jackfruit, the coolest vegan meat substitute ever.
Loaded nachos
At their most recent Friday night dinner, Club Mexicana offered a solid and surprisingly well-priced menu of small and large plates. The small options included roasted cornbread with mole, pedron peppers, tortilla soup, and loaded nachos. Obviously we got the loaded nachos because dayum! Vegans need to jump at nacho opportunities when they can. Also, outside the U.S., apparently people think ‘nachos’ just means ‘plain corn chips’ and that’s terrrrrrible, so I had to take advantage of someone knowing better. The nachos had vegan cheese sauce (I think it’s house made!), black beans, ancho chili sauce, sour cream (again probably house made), jalapenos, and cilantro, which they call coriander here but coriander is the dried version so I’ll never accept that. It also had guacamole, which sadly succumbed to the British curse of being weird and creamy instead of being normal.* It was better than other attempts I’ve had here though! The nachos were really good. I was intrigued by the cheese sauce. It was really sharp yet creamy and it didn’t make me angry so right on. As with every single maker of nachos, however, the bottom layer was naked.* When will people learn to stagger the toppings on all the layers and not just dump them on top so you get really loaded chips at first but then are left with NOTHING at the end? I would be so good at nachos.
We also got the tortilla soup, which the menu called ‘sopa di tortilla’ which is accurate but I read it as carrot coconut soup for some reason?? Don’t know how that happened but luckily that’s not what arrived. The spicy, tomato-base, lime-doused soup was really good, although I would have preferred more beans (any beans?) in it. I’m just used to my tortilla soup being full of beans. Haha full of beans. This one was mainly thick broth, but the broth was delicious so it’s all good. It also was topped with the sour cream from the nachos, which was a really nice component even if it disintegrated into the soup before it even arrived.
We also got the tortilla soup, which the menu called ‘sopa di tortilla’ which is accurate but I read it as carrot coconut soup for some reason?? Don’t know how that happened but luckily that’s not what arrived. The spicy, tomato-base, lime-doused soup was really good, although I would have preferred more beans (any beans?) in it. I’m just used to my tortilla soup being full of beans. Haha full of beans. This one was mainly thick broth, but the broth was delicious so it’s all good. It also was topped with the sour cream from the nachos, which was a really nice component even if it disintegrated into the soup before it even arrived.
Sopa di tortilla. That does not translate to carrot.
We had much more trouble choosing our mains. Not only were there two entrees featuring pulled jackfruit, but they also had chili-non-carne sloppy joes and chorizo empanadas! The jackfruit came in either taco form or burrito form. I knew I had to have one, so I figured I’d continue the taco cleanse. The waitron recommended the chorizo empanadas as our second main. Excellent choice!
So I’m obsessed with pulled jackfruit now. I had it once before, at the White Owl Social Club in Portland, but it was on a burger bun and the bread overpowered it. Thin little corn tortillas really are the perfect showcase for this ridiculously inventive food. Jackfruit is yeah it’s a fruit, but when you shred it, it really resembles pork? or something crazy? It’s so mind-boggling and delicious that Upton’s Naturals is going to be selling it alongside its packaged mock meats. That’s aweeeesome! Club Mexicana’s version is hand-pulled and marinated in bourbon BBQ sauce, and served on the aforementioned little corn disks with sour cream, too-creamy guacamole again but whatever it’s still guacamole, and salted chiles. It also came with more tortilla chips and a warm cabbage slaw that I liked to put inside the tacos. These were so good. Oh man. Jackfruit is too cool.
So I’m obsessed with pulled jackfruit now. I had it once before, at the White Owl Social Club in Portland, but it was on a burger bun and the bread overpowered it. Thin little corn tortillas really are the perfect showcase for this ridiculously inventive food. Jackfruit is yeah it’s a fruit, but when you shred it, it really resembles pork? or something crazy? It’s so mind-boggling and delicious that Upton’s Naturals is going to be selling it alongside its packaged mock meats. That’s aweeeesome! Club Mexicana’s version is hand-pulled and marinated in bourbon BBQ sauce, and served on the aforementioned little corn disks with sour cream, too-creamy guacamole again but whatever it’s still guacamole, and salted chiles. It also came with more tortilla chips and a warm cabbage slaw that I liked to put inside the tacos. These were so good. Oh man. Jackfruit is too cool.
Jackfruit tacos are the bestttt! And look at all those chiles! Spicy food happening!
The chorizo empanadas were also really good, like meat-filled hand pies. I guess in England that’s just hand pies. The menu said ‘puff pastry’ but it was denser than that (which was good for this dish), like heavy buttery pie dough holding shredded chorizo-style seitan, spicy potatoes, olives, and raisins. Luckily I didn’t taste any raisin because that is weird. They were topped with the creamy guacamole, sour cream, and ancho chili sauce. This plate (all plates?) also came with the warm slaw and more chips. It was a really yummy dish, but if you are ever choosing between jack fruit and Y, you must always go with jackfruit. Unless Y is world peace or something. Or, as Husband just answered to my question of what’s better than jackfruit, “jillfruit”.
For a specialty pop-up event like this, I expected the prices to be on the higher side, because they always seem to be. But Club Mexicana’s prices were pretty decent – 10 pounds for mains and 4 for the appetizers. That’s downright cheap for London! And it was so good too! If you are free this Friday or next (or the next?), try to catch Club Mexicana at the Hornbeam Cafe. Otherwise, follow them on social media to try to find their stall in the markets. And no matter what, get something with jackfruit!
CLUB MEXICANA, LONDON
Water speed: Glass bottle and little cups were already on the table! So happy.
Service: Everyone was so nice and helpful. It was probably the best service I’ve encountered in London yet. I’m not sure if the waitrons were Hornbeam’s or Club Mexicana’s, but either way, excellent job.*
Bathrooms: A singlet, was fine. The toilet flushed which is a big deal here.
Food: Really yummy Mexican food!
Bonus: Jackfruit!
*Club Mexicana has informed me that a) the waitrons were all their own staff members, so thanks to them for being great! They also said they are working on the nacho layering and chunkifying guacamole. Fantastic!
Veganizing “Friends”: Chandler’s “Righteous” Mac & Cheese
Righteous mac & cheese with some burnt Brussels sprouts
If you know “Friends” (and I hope you do!), you know that Chandler hates, I mean HATES, Thanksgiving. His parents announced their divorce on Thanksgiving when he was nine years old, and he was so upset that he threw up all the traditional foods he had eaten. Subsequently, he refused to ever celebrate the holiday or eat ‘Thanksgiving-y’ foods. (If I recall correctly, he also started smoking at this point too. At age 9.)
So, we learn through flashbacks that, during college, Ross brought his roommate Chandler home for several Thanksgivings. The first time, Monica offered to make him mac & cheese since he didn’t eat Thanksgiving food. When eating it, Chandler said, in an offhand way, “This is great, you should be a chef!” and Monica just excitedly said “Ok!” And as we know, she became a professional chef. It’s one of my favorite Fat Monica moments, though I love her allatimes.
So, we learn through flashbacks that, during college, Ross brought his roommate Chandler home for several Thanksgivings. The first time, Monica offered to make him mac & cheese since he didn’t eat Thanksgiving food. When eating it, Chandler said, in an offhand way, “This is great, you should be a chef!” and Monica just excitedly said “Ok!” And as we know, she became a professional chef. It’s one of my favorite Fat Monica moments, though I love her allatimes.
So, the following Thanksgiving, Chandler (having dropped his Flock of Seagulls look for a Miami Vice one) asked Monica if she’d again make him some of that “righteous mac & cheese”.
So yay, we are making some righteous mac & cheese! And it’s not even Thanksgiving! (Mac & cheese is ideal for any occasion.) This is the dish that gave Monica her start as a chef! Soo important. This recipe is my usual weekly go-to, but I added a secret ingredient today – caramelized onions – to give it a richer, more autumn, more Thanksgiving-y taste.
You start by boiling carrots and potatoes. I got the idea from the famous VegNews recipe years ago, and since then I’ve adapted it into my own specialty. I usually do two pounds (!!) of each, like 7-8 small potatoes and 10 peeled and chopped carrots (not baby carrots, too sweet). Come on, you need lots of sauce! Then, you blend the vegetables with margarine, milk, nooch, cashews, mustard, lemon, salt and pepper, and sometimes soy sauce/tamari/miso if it needs to be saltier. Mix in your pasta, and voila! My favorite mac & cheese.
It’s like boiling fall
DIRECTIONS:
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INGREDIENTS:
Caramelizing the onions, feeling the flow. These shrunk down to about 1/3 of what you see here when finished
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Blending the sauce!
I make some version of this every week. I love it. The addition of caramelized onions added a warm depth of holiday flavor, but it made the dish a bit too sweet for me. However, just the natural sugars of plain cooked root vegetables, like sweet potatoes and butternut squash, are often too sweet for my tastes. So, if you are a normal person, you’ll probably really like this! You can always make it the regular way first, and then try blending the onions into a portion of it to see if you like it. Either way, it’s a delicious creamy pasta dish. It’s not as blue-box ‘cheesy’ as other recipes, but it’s my favorite. Let me know if you make it!
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Questions for Giveaway points!!
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