Obsession of the Week: Black, White, & Perfect All Over
My obsessions with black & white and with stripes have persisted for quite a while now, and this dress combining both of them is not doing me any favors. It’s perfection! I love that it’s actually structured and not free-flowing and pixie-like as the majority of dresses have been lately, catering to the I-don’t-want-to-grow-up-I’m-adorrrrable crowd. Someone please alert me when it goes on sale!
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Epic Holiday Gift Guide: Gifts Other People Will Actually Want
It’s mid-December, which means too many people are stressing out about what gifts to buy their loved ones for the holidays. What annoys me almost as much as the vast materialism and selfishness that engulfs this time of year is when people buy checklist gifts. What’s a checklist gift, you ask? It’s what I call the kind of present that people buy just to check that recipient off their list, giving absolutely no thought to what might bring the person joy. NB, so we avoid dumb comments, that my preference would be for people to simply enjoy the company of loved ones and not revel in materialism. BUT. If our society is going to make Christmastime about giving presents, at least make them good presents! Did you really think I’d enjoy the DVDs of ‘American Horror Story’? (I know it’s a great show, but I can’t watch anything remotely scary or dark. Even if just the lighting is dark. People who know me know that!) Or body wash that was tested on animals and smells like a French prostitute? Or, meanest of all, toe socks? (I have webbed toes…toe socks are like giving a toothless person an apple.) Even just writing “Hey you’re nice” on a piece of paper is a better gift for me than those three things. But those things are perfect for other people. You just have to consider the recipient! They say ‘it’s the thought that counts’ for a reason. If you are going to do presents, do them well or don’t do them at all (and focus instead on what the holidays are really about – miracle babies).
Most gift guides feature a lot of nice things that the compiler of the guide would like to get, all based on that writer’s personality. This is almost as bad! You guys don’t care what I want, right? (I mean, it’s no secret: I want tickets to every Broadway show I haven’t yet seen, plus a private audience with politicians so that I may yell at them.) What I want won’t help you in your gifting endeavor. Hell, I hate most of the stuff on this list. But the people with the personalities I describe will love it. That’s the point! You have to think about the actual person.
Also, I wanted to make a list based on personality types. I dumbed down the descriptors a tad, and I’m sure you’ll think, hey that describes different kinds of people! But for the most part it works doing it this way. You won’t find any crap below about e.g. “What to Buy Your Friend Who Loves Movies” because a) everyone freaking loves movies and b) if you have a friend whose main defining characteristic is loving movies, you don’t need help buying him a gift. See, e.g., ‘What To Get Your Friend Who Loves Baseball”; “What To Get Your Friend Who Loves Working Out”; “What To Get Your Friend Who Loves Cooking With Fancy Olive Oils”.
No more checklist gifts! You with me? Let’s get started.
Also, I wanted to make a list based on personality types. I dumbed down the descriptors a tad, and I’m sure you’ll think, hey that describes different kinds of people! But for the most part it works doing it this way. You won’t find any crap below about e.g. “What to Buy Your Friend Who Loves Movies” because a) everyone freaking loves movies and b) if you have a friend whose main defining characteristic is loving movies, you don’t need help buying him a gift. See, e.g., ‘What To Get Your Friend Who Loves Baseball”; “What To Get Your Friend Who Loves Working Out”; “What To Get Your Friend Who Loves Cooking With Fancy Olive Oils”.
No more checklist gifts! You with me? Let’s get started.
For the man who isn’t necessarily lazy but really likes his couch
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For the dapper dan who thinks you’re never fully dressed without a smile but doesn’t really smile
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For the guy who always raves about the new Daft Punk song
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For the bright-eyed guy who always makes you smile
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For that guy who is soo British, but isn’t really
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For the travelers
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For the mature female relatives (moms, aunts, sisters maybe)
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For that friend who can pull shit off
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For your childlike (not childish, it’s different) friend who brightens your day, or at least tries to
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For your adventurous friend who likes to test her limits and finds silver linings
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For your friend who has a new apartment/ office/fiance/hairdo/neck
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For the friend who sends you equal numbers of animal videos and Jezebel articles
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For your sophisticated friend who would have been more comfortable in a different decade, always looks cool, and liked American Hustle only for the costumes
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For the adorable baker
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For the woman who keeps her heels on during the commute, traveled to Hong Kong, and uses proper silverware
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For the friend who wears cardigans to work, writes in an actual journal, and wears non-prescription glasses because they look cute
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Orrrr, you can do what I do and troll your friends’ Amazon wishlists. Happy shopping!!!
Vaute Couture Preorder Sale Is On Now!
The annual Vaute Couture preorder sale is going on now! As the most beautiful cruelty-free fashion line celebrates New York Fashion Week, it is offering lucky customers the chance to preorder coats, dresses, skirts, even sweaters from the new collection, and order coats from last season, at up to 50% off, with the percentage decreasing each day for the next week.
Vaute Couture is changing the face of high fashion in favor of the animals. For those of you who can afford to support the amazing company, do it now while you get such a sick discount!
Click here for the Cold Weather Outerwear sale
Click here for the Vaute Collection Preorder
Below are my favorite picks available right now. Nothing beats the original Audrey coat (in white) in my book, but until that comes back, I’ll enjoy looking at these pretty things with envy too. And if anyone feels like being my wealthy benefactor, I’d love any one of these as a present.
Vaute Couture is changing the face of high fashion in favor of the animals. For those of you who can afford to support the amazing company, do it now while you get such a sick discount!
Click here for the Cold Weather Outerwear sale
Click here for the Vaute Collection Preorder
Below are my favorite picks available right now. Nothing beats the original Audrey coat (in white) in my book, but until that comes back, I’ll enjoy looking at these pretty things with envy too. And if anyone feels like being my wealthy benefactor, I’d love any one of these as a present.
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